June 2009

Wednesday 3rd of June 2009 and I called Tärnvåg at 13:30 and they would be alongside around 3 o'clock in Skarvikshamnen so I spent some time waiting in the reception before calling a taxi. At least I will join the ship in Göteborg so no travel. Just a taxi from the hotel to the port. Will be nice to leave, the summer is Tärnvåggone and now it's windy and cold outside so I can as well leave. But I can't wait until the 5th of August when I fly back to FUNKY TOWN and school. Hopefully prepared by having read my books everyday onboard.

I arrived just in time to see Tärnvåg arriving to the jetty. There was one AB waiting on the jetty.
- Hello Aladdin! I remember you from Tärnfjord.
I can't say that I remember him, but he is signing on Tärnvågtoday as well. After a few minutes our Seagoing Personnel Manager arrived as well. Luckily enough he had nothing to carry so he helped me with my Seagoing Personnel Managerbag.

Coming onboard and I recognized our Cook. He was the very same Cook that destroyed my diet onboard Tärnfors with all the Easter candy. The Captain from back then, by now a Pilot, reminds me about the candy in all his e-mails. I also recognized one of the ABs (from Skåne) from Tärnsund. He remembered me from the shipyard in Denmark.
- They wouldn't let you in at the disco in safety shoes.

I took a tour on deck with the AB and when we were ready it was pretty much time for dinner. I had told our Cook that I was on a strict 3 cans of tuna/ day diet.
- Please! Spank me if you caught me eating something else!
At the dinner he started to scream about the 3 cans of tuna/ day diet.
- We start tomorrow! I said.

After the dinner I returned to my temporary cabin and my Thai books. Our Chief Officer will go with us to Gävle and back to Brofjorden before going home. I thought we were going to discharge in Göteborg because she looked fully loaded when she arrived. But we will load 2000m³ of rapeseed oil or something like that. Well, anyway, I think it's something they mix in the diesel to make it environmentally friendly.

And by the way, they are using the same internet system here as in Broström. SeaIt so don't
Jaja Björn. Mina påsar blev ju en omedelbar Laundry bagssuccé som du ser.

Besättningen tittar avundsjukt efter dom. Precis som n�r jag köpte min trousse de toilette som även J uppskattade så mycket.

Jaja, bli nu inte förvånad om det kommer med någon BONUS bild på skopåsarna också. Du vet ju hur jag opererar nu. ORDNING OCH REDA
expect too much, but I hope to be able to update my page every now and then.

I will be on watch with our Chief Officer at 8 o'clock tonight so I have 2 hours of study until then. And before uploading this stuff I have one more piece of information for you. So far I have meet 2 guys from Skåne and that makes us 3.

I spent the night on the bridge with our Chief Officer and, well, Action in the CCRI recognized most of the stuff. Just some new paper work from Maersk. Maersk charter the ship and Preem is chartering the ship from Maersk so a few new papers. But it's mostly different logos.

Otherwise it's the same protests and stuff. Consultas loading computer, SAAB and the other stuff is mostly the same. Or at least it works pretty much the same way. I was off to my temporary cabin at midnight and I expect tomorrow to be an adventurous day. We will check out the deck equipment and I will go through the stuff on the computer in the CCR.

Thursday 4th of June 2009 and they called me at 07:30 for my morning watch together with the Where did the summer go?Chief Officer. I started with tea and tuna on the bridge before taking on the paperwork and bridge equipment.

After lunch it was time to take a tour on deck. First we had cancelled the tour due to heavy rain. Where the hell did the summer disappeared? Well, at least I was lucky during Where did the summer go?my weekend in Göteborg with summer weather every day. But now it's cold again, ok, I'm still wearing shorts but I had to wear a pullover. Gloomy and grey and rain is in the air so I would have been better off with a pair of panta longas, but I refuse to wear panta longas between May and september. If it's summer it is summer!

But after lunch the rain stopped and we could go on deck. Where did the summer go?Our 2nd Officer joined us and I could take the safety round at the same time I checked out the ship with the Chief Officer.

We spent a few hours on deck and when we were ready I returned to my cabin for a shower and my Thai books. Hard studies and I'm sure my Teacher will be impressed and hopefully the Filipino girl in her Bangkok University uniform.

Everything seems to be working fine on deck and the equipment seems to be in good condition. A little hydraulic
Nä Björn, nu kan jag inte hålla mig längre. Jag får slänga in Laundry bagsdom däringa BONUS BILDERNA redan nu.

Där var ju hängare p� mina skopåsar också så dom åkte upp på väggen dom också. Trousse de toiletteSuccé som du ser och jag är dig evigt tacksam för att du tog mig till denna affär så väsorterad med kvalitets varor.

Och när man ändå e på gång kan man ju lägga in en bild på min trousse de toilette som även J uppskattade så mycket. Du vet ju hur jag opererar nu. ORDNING OCH REDA och nu hoppas jag att vi kan få ordning och reda på dig med.

- Psst, och då menar jag inte att du ska gå omkring i gympabyxor modell 70 tal, good morning boots och magbälte.
oil in the pipe tunnel, but we will have our best ABs to remove it tomorrow so the ship is ready for the upcoming vetting inspection in Gävle at arrival on Saturday.

I spent a few hours reading Thai in the afternoon and writing on my web page. I knew that they are reading my web page at the company so I have to write how hard we work and how nice the ship is. It's a little sensitive with the ship owners from Donsö. I remember when I was on Prospero. The ship owner�s sister was onboard and they were knocking on my door.
- Hello, my sister wants to meet you!
She was sitting in the sofa on the bridge and she asked me what I thought about the ship.
- Well, it's very nice. Build a few more ships and you will get the experience to build ships as good as Tärntank.
I kid you not. She sprung out of the sofa starting to scream. I thought she was going to kill me. - What the??!!

We passed the Great Belt during the day and in the late afternoon the sun broke through the clouds, but it's still strong winds and I'm better off staying inside.

Friday 5th of June 2009 and I started the day by a safety round with the Chief Engineer. We checked all the fire fighting equipments and when we were ready I took my breakfast tuna to the bridge. We were approaching Öland's Södra when I came on the bridge and when I left after the watch we had just passed Öland's Södra L/H.

I went straight to my cabin and my Thai books and I skipped lunch because now it's time to get
Before
After
serious with the diet. I lost control over the diet the last few days. And this is no way to impress my Teachers back home.

When I had done my Thai studies I went to do some Seagull Courses to get my Safety Officer certificate. This is some new bullshit they have come up with. I never heard of a Safety officer certificate before. Well, anyway, I finished the 5 CDs and if this is the way they are going to increase safety I just say, GOOD LUCK!

Saturday 6th of June 2009 and today I will try a new trick. I prepared my tuna and 2 slices of knäckebröd yesterday after my watch. So now I don't have to go to the mess room and all the temptations before going on watch and I can go straight from the shower to the bridge.

Well, anyway, I need a long hot shower to wake up in the morning so there isn't much time to In Gävleprepare my tuna in the morning.

It was a beautiful morning with sunshine and the wind disappeared In Gävleand the sea was like a windmill pond. But it was only 10°C so it's no summer yet. Pilot is expected to come onboard just after 12 so I was down from the bridge when it was time to take the Pilot.

First line at 13:10 and gangway down at 13:30 and a few minutes later the Vetting Inspector and Company Representative were onboard. We expect the Surveyors to be onboard around 3 o'clock in the afternoon. Hopefully the Vetting Inspector will be off soon.
We have problem with our computer system for the cargo valves and the In Gävleengine alarms so we had to wait for a Technician from Kongsberg in Norway before we could start discharging.

We also got a new 2nd Officer onboard and, well, of course the first thing he mentioned was aladdin.st so as I use to say to J: It's an institution in the shipping industry.

I was on the bridge when the AB on watch called me.
- Here is a guy that knows you on the jetty!
It was my brother�s neighbour and I had received an e-mail from my brother with a request to take a picture of him to put on the web page. Well, Vetting inspection and I don't feel In Gävlelike donning my boiler suit. 2nd Officer volunteered to go down take a picture. But taking pictures on deck would not have been appreciated by the Vetting Inspector so I had to take a picture from the bridge.

Well, I hope he is satisfied with the picture. The Kongsberg Technician had the problem under control and we could start discharging at 18:25 and it looks like we will be out of here tomorrow morning.

The Vetting Inspector left us at 11 o'clock and we finished the Gasoil parcel to Statoil at 23:10. The gasoline will be ready around 1 o'clock In Gävleso I went on deck after my watch to refresh my stripping skills with the AB (Skåning #4, yeah, I found out that we're 5 guys from Skåne onboard) Well, the stripping is the same as on Tärnvik, but since its a few years since last time on Tärnvik I can as well do a refresher with Skåning #4.

Luckily enough I found a used boiler suit in a man's size. I got a new one when coming onboard, but I was a wee bit too optimistic and, OK, I will be straight forward with you. A few days more on the Kick ass diet would not hurt before donning the BABY SIZE boiler suit.

And its only 5°C so I wish I had my fur hat with me. But it was OK in the pipe tunnel and we talked about the good old times and time turned quickly.
In Gävle
In Gävle
Stripping with Skåning #4

Sunday 7th of June 2009 and we completed the gasoil parcel to Preem when I came on my watch. Same trick as yesterday, I prepared my tuna and 2 slices of knäckebröd yesterday after my watch. So now I don't have to go to the mess room and all the temptations before going on watch and I can go straight from the shower to the bridge.

Plenty time for morning tea and the tuna before we started the Rapeseed stuff parcel. We
Jo du, unge Herr Sjö Officeren

Som du först�r så e d samma Kock som på Tärnfors. Påskgodiset vi alldrig blev av med hur mycket vi än proppade i oss. Just en snygg kille o ha ombord när man e på diet

Nu när man har dig på linjen kan man ju lika gärna passa på att lägga ut lite bilder på bryggan.
completed discharging at 13:35 and Pilot was onboard at 14:25 and it will be nice to leave Gävle behind bound for Brofjorden.

After departure there was time for a shower and some Thai studies. (With a quick stop in the kitchen where our Cook enticed me to eat some cake) Our Agent brought some recordable CDs for me before departure and my language lessons were burnt to CD so now I will listen to Thai on the bridge driving the AB on watch up the walls.

But what the heck? I was on watch with one Chief Officer on the 4 to 8 watch back in the days. He had one cassette with country and western music and believe me, I was about to jump overboard listening to this bullshit. That was some of the worst crap I ever had listened to.
Our Bridge
Our bridge
Håll till godo Nicke!

Our Bridge
Our bridge with the CCR
Håll till godo Nicke!
I decided to skip dinner due to the cake incident and I went to be for a quick power nap. Up stripping during the night and on the bridge all afternoon.

It was a beautiful evening and we passed Ålands hav during my night watch. Plenty traffic so time turned quick. Well, actually I was so busy I only had time to finish one and a half barrel of tea instead of the usual two.

Monday 8th of June 2009 and same trick as yesterday, I prepared my tuna and 2 slices of knäckebröd yesterday after my watch. So now I don't have to go to the mess room and all the temptations before going on watch and I can go straight from the shower to the bridge. But I'm a worried man, yesterday I found out that our Cook had made a new cake and I found it in the fridge when I prepared my breakfast. But today I will stay well clear of the cake.

It was a gloomy and grey day when I came on the bridge. Our AB had prepared our fixed ventilation fan for ventilation of the 5 & 7 P/S. Previous cargo gasoline and we need to get them gas free before loading the gasoil in Brofjorden. I pushed a button and the tanks were gas free after my watch. I kept my self busy with cargo planning and paperwork until late afternoon and I almost forgot my language course.
Coming on my night watch we passed Skåne, a beautiful sight with the sun setting over Skåne. I have not seen the coast line of Skåne for a few years now and I was almost touched to tears.

Tuesday 9th of June 2009 and it was a beautiful morning when I came on my morning watch. ETA On the way to BrofjordenBrofjorden Pilot station at 2 o'clock in the afternoon. We passed Göteborg on my watch and it was 18°C so I guess the summer is on the way back.

After my watch I checked our deck and I had time for part one of my language course before going on the bridge. Coming on the bridge and our Pilot had just boarded us and we recognised each Captain and the Pilotother.
- Aladdin! I have not seen you in a very long time.
- I haven't been here for quite a few years now.

We have a few of the crew members signing off and there were no sign of the on signers at arrival. But there was a guy from the trade union's magazine Sjömannen and he is going to make a reportage about the ship. I stayed well clear of this guy. I'm like a baby and I speak my mind and I'm not exactly found of the trade union.

After dinner, kålpudding, I returned to my cabin and part two of my language course and I have to finish before going on watch at 8 o'clock tonight.

Wednesday 10th of June 2009 and our 2nd Officer called me at 06:45.
- 1 hour to go!
I was dead tired. After a long hot shower (Didn't do very much to wake me up though). I had been on deck comparing drafts until early morning. I went to the bridge with my prepared tuna and Leaving Brofjordenknäckebröd. I asked our 2nd Officer to reduce Loading rate to 400m³/h and to go on the jetty to check our draft.

The original plan was to load full cargo of ULSD (Ultra Low Sulphur Diesel) to Thames. But seems like it changed to Glasgow and in Glasgow its maximum draft 8,7m in Fresh Water. So I took charge in the CCR while our 2nd Officer was on the jetty checking drafts. We stopped at 8,44m forward and 8,6m aft and that will give us 8,7m even keel at arrival in Fresh Water.

We completed loading at 06:25 and Pilot was ordered for 9 o'clock. Coming down from the CCR to get a bottle of low fat milk for the bridge I meet our newly Leaving Brofjordenon signed AB. We were working together 1991 as ABs on Tärnsund.

Paperwork and calculation was ready at 07:45 and our Surveyor left and now it's just to wait for the cargo documents to come onboard. I had time to drink tea and relax a bit and when the cargo documents arrived we finished this business in about 10 minutes and Pilot was onboard at 9 o'clock. At 09:10 we left jetty #5 in Brofjorden. I was together with the newly on signed AB and our new Cadet on the fo'c's'le and our new OS and one AB was on the poop deck.

It was a gloomy and grey morning with an annoying drizzle so it was nice when we left jetty #5 behind and so I could return to the bridge to talk with our Pilot. He was Captain on Aurum back in the 80's when I was an AB onboard.
Brofjorden
Tärnbris loading and Nimbus is coming to take our jetty
It was nice to leave Brofjorden, but it had been fun. Well, I don't know if fun is the word I'm looking for. But I haven't been loading a ship in a long time. I haven't performed any cargo operations since the STS transfer with Barcarolle and Bro Promotion so my watch yesterday evening had been a quick one. Plenty to do with ballast and the loading operation.
Leaving Brofjorden
Leaving Brofjorden
Our Pilot is leaving us
I kept my self busy after leaving the Pilot behind. Millions of fishing vessels so I had to zig zag my way towards Glasgow. But time turned quick, it was also a very long time since I had had a navigation watch on a bridge. My last time was for the few times I relieved our 2nd Officer on the General snusbridge on Bro Promotion so he could go do some of his work. I'm relieving him on the bridge and he didn�t had to work overtime.
Almost like the Engineers, except that the 2nd Officer had to work on the weekends. Never mind the ship falling apart, its 5 o'clock for God's sake!

Well, after departure I went to sleep and when I woke up I got
Hi Aladdin,

How are you? As you know, we are recruiting Seafarers for Tanker Operations. Our clients are well established owners and management companies and they are seeking officers with your background for permanent jobs. Our urgent requirements are for Master Mariners and Chief Officers for VLPG, LPG, VLCC and Product Carriers.

What is your availability. Perhaps you know other people who would be interested?

Chief Officers will need 12 months in rank on the vessel type however guys with strong profiles will be of great interest to us.

I understand you would like to get sea time on Gas carriers and I have vacancies on LPG. They are looking for 6 months in rank but maybe they will consider your background?

Please get back to me today.

Regards,
my snus. I ordered 15 rolls and they arrived yesterday so now my fridge is full so I will be good until 5th of August when I return to FUNKY TOWN and my school. And yes, I still remember my Teachers birthday 7th of August, my first school day back in FUNKY TOWN. But that's another 2 months until then, well, actually it's a little less and time turns quick around here.

But how long can I stay home next time? I receive e-mails from companies all over the world and they are desperate for experienced Chief Officers. That's good, a few years ago I was too old and they only wanted young guns. But since the oil companies have started with their Officers experience matrix. Captain and Chief Officer should have, I think 5 years of combined sea service in position or they won't charter the ship.

Well, we understand that we can't have a Chief Officer 23 years old and a Captain that's 25 years
"How to tackle the crew crisis" (23 February, page 32)

I was rather shocked by some of the imprudent suggestions made by industry people regarding alleviating the perceived shortage of ship's crews. The solution to the looming crew shortage is extremely simple: money!
  Anybody with a smidgen of economic schooling knows that supply, demand and price levels are interrelated. In a free market, when prices go up, overtime supply of a commodity or a service will increase.

In other words, with better wages, ships can still be manned with competent seafarers. However, if wages are kept stagnant, sooner or later the more intelligent ones will look for lucrative jobs ashore.

I never understood why owners of a capital-intensive asset like a ship want to operate it with the cheapest - often substandard - crews. These owners must be fans of "The Simpsons", an US TV cartoon series in which the dim-witted Homer Simpson is at the controls of a nuclear power plant.
Do we want complex ships - often operating in a dangerous environment - to be manned by mental midgets?

I would be frightened to go to sea with them. In time of danger you want to have competent people around you. Furthermore, why is it that penny-pinching should only apply to ships' crews? How about cutting some executives from the payroll? In many instances, the salary of one of them would pay for a complete well-trained crew of 25 to 30 people.
old running a ship. Not much experience no matter how many of Seagull's stupid training CDs they have done.

But this is how it is today and they have a Master plan to get inexperienced Officers experienced. The plan is for them to study Seagull's training CDs and Seagull's CDs won�t help much to improve anything. OK, Seagull's funds will increase.

But to get experienced people to the shipping industry? Well, I can't help but to think about the e-mail I got from the Captain on Barcarolle. It was an article in Trade Winds on the solution to the crew crisis. But I guess Seagull is cheaper.

The Captain on Barcarolle had been Captain for 20-25 years and he was still able to give me pointers about the Chief Officer's job. And, yeah, many other Captains I have been working with don't know f@ck all about their own job and even (if possible) less about the Chief Officer's job. But of course, they know how to talk about everything they do. Especially when there is a representative from the company onboard. There is no end to it, but as soon as the representative is back ashore they don't even know how to find their way to the fo'c's'le.
- And please! Don't get me started by asking me if I had met any drunks on the ships.

Let me give you an example of what kind of questions they ask on Seagull's training CD:
You are going to take a life raft from amidships to the fo'c's'le. Which way is the best way to get the life raft to the fo'c's'le.
a) 2 guys carry the life raft forward (With a picture of 2 sullen looking guys with back pain carrying the heavy life raft)
b) 4 guys lifting it up on a trolley and then they push the trolley forward. (With a picture of 4 smiling guys)
And how to recognise a terrorist or a drug smuggler? He is out of season dressed.

Where do they come up with all this bull shit? But answer those questions and you will soon have plenty good looking certificates.

Well, anyway, coming on my night watch we were south bound for Thames. Obviously they have decided to skip Glasgow and we changed course from West to South.

Thursday 11th of June 2009 and it was a gloomy and grey morning when I came on my watch. But AB on deckthe sun broke through the clouds after a few hours and it turned in to a nice day. AB on watch is chipping on deck and our new OS and Deck Cadet are cleaning STB FW tank.

Captain spent most of my watch on the bridge so time turned quick. We also received voyage instructions for our next voyage. Full cargo of ULSD from Brofjorden to Rostock. It was soon 12 o'clock and In the engine roomI was relieved by our 2nd Officer.

I started to do my discharge plan before I went to the mess room so I was almost 30 minutes late for my plate of white cabbage.

AB on watch is fixing our portable ventilation fans and after my cabbage I went on deck for a chat. We discussed the maintenance and painting of deck and when we were ready we went down to the engine room to check out the FW tank.
FW tank
FW tank
Skåning #4 enters the FW tank
I did not even try to get through the manhole
Coming down to the engine room and the man hole to the FW tank and I was quick to realize that I In the engine roomwill never make it through the hole. Well, luckily enough our OS and Deck Cadet are small so it's no problem for them. Our AB from Skåne is a wee bit smaller than me so he entered the tank. But I went down on deck and I had a peek and a picture.

It turned out that this tank looked much better than the FW tank on port side. So it's mainly cleaning and some minor chipping and painting.

That's good news, our crew will soon be ready with the tank and we can get all crew on deck. The chipping machines and paint is waiting for them. But I can't say that I'm worried about deck it looks very good. But of course, I'm coming from Barcarolle and Bro Promotion. For the crew onboard Tärnvåg it looks terrible. But I guess this depends on what you are used to.
FW tank
FW tank
Skåning #4 coming out from the FW tank
I was happy to stay outside
A sunny day turned in to a gloomy and grey evening. Overcast and passing showers. Looks like we have to drop anchor at Sunk until Sunday. But by now we know how it works in the shipping. They tell you 14th of June and that means f@ck all. Can as well be tonight or the 16th of June.
Well, we see what happens.

I spent most of the afternoon doing paper work on the bridge, but I had time for my Thai course and a hot shower before going on my night watch. We dropped anchor at Sunk 2230
(2130 LT) and no news for us.

Friday 12th of June 2009 and it was a beautiful day when I came on my morning watch at Sunk Traininganchorage. We're anchored 1,8 Nm NW of Sunk W1 L/B. Nice weather and we took the opportunity the get our lifeboat and MOB boat waterborne. Our 2nd Officer had to eat breakfast before they started to test the Looking out in the bluelife boat. So I had plenty time for my prepared breakfast and my good morning tea.
I also had time to check my e-mail and it looks like we're planned to load full cargo of ULSD back to Thames in Brofjorden after discharging in Rostock.

They started to take out the life boat at 9 o'clock and at 11 o'clock we were ready with the test of the lifeboat and MOB boat.

I was on the bridge in 2 steps where Captain was enjoying my freshly made music CD. It didn't took long before I had a kettle on. I spent the last Looking out in the bluehour sipping my tea talking with the Chief Engineer. He joined us in Brofjorden and, yeah, we talked about the good old days.

Lunch, and it turned out that Veritas is a well known company. OK, the shipping world is very small. Our Vetting Inspector in Gävle told us that one of Broström's ships had been stopped in Mongstad, Norway due to a drunk Captain. So everyone knows what's happening.

When I was in Astoria and after lifting ashore the Captain in Kaliningrad the company said that there would be no more alcohol onboard their ships. Well, what did I wrote a few months ago? One of their Captains was almost running aground and the coastguard had to come onboard to get the Captain of the ship. It was the drunken Captain that we lifted ashore in Kaliningrad with his arse full of narcotics. He had rammed most of the medical narcotics up his arse and the rest of it he mixed in a bottle of whiskey. Yeah, pills falling out of his arse when we took him ashore. We got our Agent's in Kaliningrad side of the story by e-mail:
1. FYI I myself was this morning at the hospital, our doctors managed to recover Captain from deep koma he was in after mixing morphin and insomin with wiskies. I have this deadly mix in my office if u want I can send it with Dixi tonight together with packings of tablets and morphin.
2. I had some problems with customs as it is forbidden to use narcotics from ship during stay. I shall need a couple of bottles of good whiskies to calm down the matter with customs.
3. Preliminary expences for hospitalization come to 600-700 US dollars, pls confirm u reimburse.
Well, anyway, the Captain we lifted off the ship came onboard with the coastguard.
- I take over the command, Captain drunk told Captain drunk #2

During lunch I heard that one of their Captains is in jail for drugs. In one port the whole crew had been drunk and they were not allowed to leave. I have reported this in both Veritas and Broström and the only reaction is that I'm a pain in the arse. People are concerned about the environment and the oil transports on the sea and especially on the Baltic Sea. And the Shipping companies have Captains onboard that can't even find their way out of their own cabins.

OK, this was fun and I was laughing when I heard it. I have been in Tärntank's ships for a long time. They were looking for a Captain for one of their ships. I was recommended.
- Aladdin! He needs to see a stylist, the Seagoing Personnel Manager said.
They found another Captain and after 4 days they had to come carry the drunken bastard off the ship. I was wetting my pants laughing.

Remember what I wrote back in.....Hang on a sec, I will go back to review my notes. Yeah, it was
Imagine me starting a TAXI company, we can call my freshly started company for �The drunken driver�. My drivers all have a history as drunken drivers.

How many of you think that anyone would send their children to school with my taxi company? Is there anyone thinking that anyone would want any of those cars to traffic the streets?
- What was that? No one!
- Can someone then please explain for me why they want me to stay on their ship accepting a drunken driver?

But I'm proud of my company and I show (with pride) everyone that bothers listening to my nagging about my nice and safe cars. They all tell me that I should be proud of such a good taxi company.
- You really maintain a high safety standard in your company. And you cars are well maintained.
Everyone is happy, especially me because I have such a nice company.

But one day I run in to Aladdin #2 and the shit hits the fan!
- Look what I nice taxi I have! Aladdin #1 say to Aladdin #2
- But the driver is drunk! Aladdin #2 says.
- Your only complaining, Aladdin #1 replies instead of giving the drunken driver the foot.

There is no end to the complains, Aladdin #2 continues:
- You have a flat tyre!
- Your only complaining, Aladdin #1 replies instead of changing the flat tyre.

Yeah, I might look stupid but I'm not. I understand that they think I'm a pain in the arse informing them about alcohol abusers and that they prefer people only telling them how good everything is.
back in 2005. The incident in Kaliningrad was in 2004 and the Captain in Veritas Tankers complained about my web page to the Swedish Data Inspection Board. I was looking forward to see the police assaulting my home.

Well, me and J (Sverige's näst tjockaste Hip Hoppare) was waiting for them to come, but nothing happened and we were disappointed. Yeah, I would like to have a few pictures of the police bursting in to my friend�s apartment on my web page.

Well, lunch and most of the people knew the Captain that we had lifted ashore in Kaliningrad and we all had about the same stories to tell from different companies.

Cod fish for lunch and my diet is on the right track. Well, at least until I discovered that our new Cook (Also familiar with the Captain from Veritas) had made rhubarb cake and things got out of hand. Rhubarb cake and ice cream and I could hardly move when we had our fire drill at 1 o'clock. But from now on I will be back to my diet. The first few days onboard it's hard to resist all the temptations.

We need this drill to get the right mixture of action (drill), love (The girl at FUNKY TOWN Fire drillInternational Airport), horror (drunken Captains) and daily life on www.aladdin.st. Everything to keep the visitors excited.

At 13:00 the fire alarm went off and we mustered at the muster station. Immediate Fire drillaction and I took my group to fire station #2 to get them donned in their smoke diving kit.

Fire on 2nd deck and our Motorman is missing. My smoke diving team entered deck 2 from port side and well trained as they are Fire drillthey soon had the fire under control.

When they had the fire under control our well trained crew started to search for our missing Motorman and he was soon found. (In his cabin reading comic books) When Fire drillmy smoke divers had done their job well done it was time for the back up team to take care of our by now angry Fire drillMotorman.
- What the hell? I'm trying to read my comic book and you're running around here disturbing me.
When the Motorman was saved our 2nd Officer showed us how the Fire drillOxyvac was working. Our Motorman still restrained on the stretcher.

We finished the drill at 2 o'clock and I was quickly in my cabin and my Thai course.

OK, honestly, I felt asleep after 20 minutes of reading, but it has for sure been and adventurous day on M/T Tärnvåg. But I was up and about in time for my night watch. Still anchored and I checked the gas measuring equipment in our cabinet on the bridge. There was plenty to throw away in the cabinet and it looked better when I was ready so I was pretty pleased when I went down to prepare my breakfast at midnight.

Saturday 14th of June 2009 and we were still anchored when I came on my morning watch. Gloomy and grey and the temp was at an impressing 13°C. Summer?? Well, the sun broke through the clouds and at lunch it was nice weather. But still around 13°C, but I hope the temp is picking up a few degrees because it's BBQ in the afternoon.

And who wants� to sit outside when it's 13°C? But there is no wind, at the moment, so there is hope for the temp to rise a bit. Well, anyway, during the afternoon our new OS and Deck Cadet finished the chipping of the FW tank and our OS and the AB on the 12-4 watch painted the first layer on the spots.

A long tedious watch at the anchorage. Plenty time to scratch my arse.
- Yeah, dream on!
I had to run around resetting alarms (Spent most of the time locating the alarms) most of the time. Power failure test and when we were ready we knew that everything was Fire drillworking as it should. All navigation equipment had emergency power from the emergency generator. But the entertainment centre and tea machine was out of power.

I did my laundry in the afternoon and I sorted some music that I got from our 2nd Officer. Hip Hop from Skåne and how can that go wrong? It can't! I also had time to study my language course and I was hungry when it was time to eat. But I had to leave the table, it was so good and I could not stop eating. And I left the table in the nick of time. Our Cook had made two cakes as well and, yeah, if I would have stayed I would have had a very hard time to say no.

Sunday 14th of June 2009 and it was a gorgeous morning when I came on my morning watch with my prepared breakfast. I was sipping my tea when Captain came and told me that berthing prospects was changed.
- Earliest on Tuesday.
Well, I'm in no hurry and if we stay here for another week won�t bother me. The guys can keep them self busy painting and chipping on deck.

Monday 15th of June 2009 and it was a gloomy and grey morning. Around 10 o'clock it became foggy. Bit Oktavia arrived to the Pilot station 02:00 this morning and they say that we will go alongside when she is ready. But while waiting we take the opportunity to do as many drills as possible.

After lunch we will have an “Emergency Steering Drill” and an oil spill drill. No end to the excitements and time turns quick. Our new Cook is making special salad since I had a serious talk with her yesterday about my diet. And she was chocked when she came to the mess room and found all the salad bowls empty (except the grated raw carrots ugh! ) at lunch.
- No more salad! This is the first time I ever seen the salad bowls empty at lunch.
- What do you expect with a hard working Chief Officer onboard? I asked.

In my cabin after lunch and of course I forgot my camera when I left for the drills. But I have posted many pictures from different drills from my other ships so I have to rely on your imagination. But I will try to have my camera with me next time.

I skipped dinner in order to get my diet on the right track. When I came out from my cabin our Cook told me that she had made a bowl of salad for me.
- It's in the fridge in the kitchen.
- Great!
I went down to get the salad and I prepared my breakfast for tomorrow.

I had my salad in my cabin while watching a movie and when I went down with the empty bowl I ran in to our Cook again.
- It was delicious!
- Do you eat everything? She asked.
- Not pineapple and mushrooms.
- So I can make salad with scrimps and ham?
- It would be very good. But the one you're making now is delicious!
- Yeah, but if you eat the same every day it will taste like wood after a while.
I asked our Cook if she could prepare a bowl for lunch and dinner for me.
- No problem!
Good, I don't have to go to the mess room for lunch and dinner. I will take my salad when they are finished and I can dodge all the temptations. I'm confident, for the first day since joining the ship, that I will be back looking good for my Teacher birthday. For sure, I'm not looking forward to coming back like Porky ”The Lard Ass“

Coming on my night watch and they told me that the Pilot will be onboard tomorrow morning at 04:30 (03:30 LT) and we expect to be alongside around 11 o'clock. we next voyage will be Brofjorden to Thames. Due to the delays this time the Brofjorden to Rostock voyage was cancelled.
We had a terrible thunder storm passing over us when I had been on my night watch for an hour. The bridge was full of people watching the shindy. It turned black when the showers passed and the shy was full of flashed. Beautiful, yes, maybe. But our already slow and instable internet disappeared just when I was about to upload my web page.

Tuesday 16th of June 2009 and we were on the way up river Thames when I came on my morning Thameswatch. A beautiful morning with sunshine and blue sky. Or as our Pilot said:
- This is payback for the 10 months a year with shitty weather.

I had my morning tea and my prepared breakfast while our Deck Cadet, OS and the AB on watch prepared deck for arrival. When they were ready they tested the P/V valves and I could see on the computer screen on the bridge that the P/V valves were working.

I left the bridge at half past 9 and I went on deck to do a few checks before going to the fo'c's'le for the mooring . I have not been on deck for a mooring for quite a Thamesfew years now. But I guess it's like using a pushbike. Once you have done it you pretty much know how to do it.

I checked all the valves on the manifold and in the pipe tunnel and I had a few words with one of the ABs about the good old times.

We checked some of the stuff around the manifold area and at 9 o'clock I went forward to the fo'c's'le where one AB and the Deck Cadet were waiting.

When we approached the jetty I took my place at the winch control and when we were closer the AB had the heaving line ashore. At 10:10 S/T we had our springs ashore at VOPAK Jetty #1. Breast lines Thamesand head lines were taken ashore by a boat and when we had our lines ashore the boat went aft to get ashore the stern lines. At 09:30 we had all fast and 10 minutes later our gangway was ashore.

Before going to the bridge we tested our emergency stops for the cargo pumps and I was on the bridge 2 minutes before the Surveyors came up.
- Can we take the ullage by a MMC? I have a rookie with me and I will show him the tricks of the trade, the Surveyor Thamesasked.
- No problem, I said.

They were almost finished with the manual ullage when the Loading Master arrived to the bridge and we did the paper work while the Surveyors took the samples. Everything was ready at 12:00 and 2nd Officer came to relieve me.

I returned to my cabin (Internet was a goner. What a surprise!) trying to spend some time and thus trying to be late for lunch. I was 10 minutes early and Falusausage for lunch. My favourite. But our Cook had made a bowl of salad for me and I was a
Before
After
little ashamed when she caught me red handed with the Falusausage. She is nice enough to go through the extra trouble making me special salad and I'm eating Falusausage. But my diet is on the right track and I feel good.

Wednesday 17th of June 2009 and I was already in the shower when they called to wake me up. Coming out of the shower and I looked out my window, the cargo arms are still connected. I was early on the bridge, our Chief Engineer had been ashore yesterday and he bought me a tea mug. So I was looking forward to a cup of tea and my prepared breakfast.

We completed discharging at 08:25 S/T a little late due to closed shore valve. We were discharging the last 20m³ from 6P when they closed the shore valve. No battery in the radio so no contact with shore. Our Agent was onboard and he asked me when we were about to complete discharging.
- I have a few cubic metres left and we're ready, I said.
- Good.
- Yeah, but the battery just ran flat in the radio so I have no contact with the terminal.
- I can call them on my phone, the Agent offered.
Obviously there must have been some misunderstanding because they closed the valve ashore.

Paper work was ready at 9 o'clock and the pilot had been onboard for 10 minutes already. Our new Cadet(Ordered for 09:00) That's the spirit we're looking for. At 09:10 we left Vopak's jetty #1 in Thames.

We left the Pilot at 12 thirty something and our AB could start Our new Cadetthe tank cleaning. Well, we blow the lines and super stipp the tanks. We got a new Cadet in Brofjorden last time when the other Deck Cadet went home. And what a difference!

Seriously, I don't know what they think. I want to be a Chief Officer sitting on my arse all day long. Well, our new deck Cadet is interested to learn and then it's fun to have them onboard and it's also fun to give them pointers. We have our Deck
Our Cadet on Bro Provider
Cadet on Bro Provider fresh in mind.

I'm sure that he will be a good Chief Officer one of those days. And I can see that our new Deck Cadet is built of the same material.

Well, he is from Stockholm but he claims to have his roots in Skåne.
- Who the hell do you try to impress? I asked.
Trying to impress who? Both the AB and I are from Skåne and we're the real thing. I can't help thinking about when I was signing on a ship a few years ago. Well, by now it's quite some years ago. Let's take a stroll down the memory lane.

I was joining a ship on Råå roads when the ship passed Helsingborg. I climbed up on deck and I said hello to the AB at the pilot ladder.
- Are you from Skåne as well? He asked.
- Is there anyone else from Skåne onboard? I asked
- I'm also from Skåne, he said.
- But you don't speak the lingo!
- No, I'm from North of Sweden but I have been living in Helsingborg for 15 years!
- Well, Skåning is nothing you become. Skåning is something you're born as.
From that moment I called him “fake Skåning” and he was angry and he didn't spoke with me.

Well as I said when I was on Rainbow Warrior. Our Bosun from New Zealand asked our Spanish deckhand if she had any friends he could get married with.
- So you want to become Spanish? She asked.
- Your born Spanish, it's nothing you become. If a cat moves out to the barn it doesn't become a horse I said.
- Are you a Nazi? They asked me.
After that I became the “Ship Nazi” but I still claim that I will be Swedish for the rest of my life, where ever I choose to live in the world. Now they call them self Swedish as soon as they have From Skånepassed the bridge over Öresund. And that's even when they don't speak a Swedish word!

Well, anyway, I spent the afternoon on deck with our AB and Deck Cadet before returning to my Thai lessons in my cabin. In my cabin sitting down relaxing I can feel that I'm starting to get a cold. A few of the crew has a cold. I hope that it's not the swine flu. Well, hopefully I will be better during the night. Usually I never get sick, even if the whole ship is down and out in cold. It must be my genes from Skåne.

And my diet is on the right track, today its 15 holes in the belt.
- Hmm, was it 16 or 14 yesterday?
I'm pretty sure it was 14 holes yesterday and I told our Cook that I was aiming for 20 holes when it's time to go home. I'm not proud of it, but yeah, I put the responsibility on her shoulders.
- Now it's up to you! I said.

Thursday 18th of June 2009 and coming on watch I discovered that the wind had picked up to a force 5 from West, but it was a sunny morning. We will be at Lysekil Pilot around midnight and from there it's about 1 hour to the jetty. So I will have to finish my cargo plan before arrival, but still no loading orders.

I was late for my salad because I finished my cargo planning on the bridge before leaving for lunch. Seems like our Cook doesn�t trust me. She is always asking if I'm cheating.
- You don't eat any cookies?
- Of course, I'm on the 16th hole in my belt!
- If you cheat I stop making special food for you!
Of course, that's the beauty of it. She is going through the extra trouble and it would be VERY embarrassing to get caught eating cookies or something else. So I stick to my salad and my tuna for breakfast. Salad for lunch and dinner.

- Is it tasting good? Our Cook is asking
- No, honestly it tastes like wood.
- What.......??!!
- It was good the first two days, but now it tastes like wood. But it's good, a 2 minutes meal last for 15 minutes.
- Yes, it's good to eat slowly, she said.
- Yeah, you can stretch the 15 minutes to 20 if you�re hanging around disturbing me.
OK, seriously, the only fun at the meals is to pester our Cook and the 2nd Officer on the 4 to 8 watch. (Lunch time only) 2nd Officer is laughing and our Cook is getting angry, at least the first few days. I think she realizes by now that I'm only joking.

Sitting in my cabin doing Thai practice and suddenly the Danish network kicked in. I called my friend from Göteborg, the very same one that left for Germany when I joined Tärnvåg. Only one bar, but it was enough to send a SMS. I got an instant reply.
“I'm painting my house”

Coming on my watch 10 minutes later and I called him. The “one bar ” in my cabin turned in to full network cover when I came on the bridge.
- Where are you?
- We're taking Pilot in Brofjorden at midnight.
- Great, I can come onboard tomorrow.
We decided that he would come pick me up tomorrow and we will celebrate midsummer at Back in 2005his house on Bohusmalmön. 40 minutes away with car and 5 minutes by boat. But it's gale warning so his boat is still on land.
- I don't have any Camel, but I have PRINCE ROUNDED TASTE, new name for PRINCE light.
- That sounds good!
Well, I asked around with the crew if anyone had any spirits. No one buys any liquor on the ship, only when it's time to sign off. But I was lucky, the AB on my watch had a bottle of Whiskey so I borrowed the bottle from him.

ETA to Pilot station 5 minutes before midnight, but due to the gale the Pilot didn't want to come out to the Pilot boarding area. So I was in my cabin when we took onboard the pilot inside the light houses at Brofjorden approach.

Friday 19th of June 2009 (Midsummer) and when I came on my morning watch the crew had almost finished carrying onboard the provision. Loading was up and running after a stop for foot samples. Looking like we will be ready to leave around 7 o'clock tonight. Good, I have time to go see my friend. He called me at 9 o'clock and he asked how it looked.
- We will be ready to leave late afternoon, I said.
- Good, then you can come.

He had a few friend coming up from Göteborg and he asked if I could go with them.
In the taxi- No problem.
- They can't find the way to Brofjorden. Can you take a taxi to Hillestorp? (or something like that)
Our 2nd Officer relieved me at 11 and I was in my cabin for a quick shower. Taxi ordered for 11:30 and according to my friend it should be 10-15 minutes to Hillestorp (or something like that) where I should meet his friends at 11:45. Well, according to our driver it was almost 30 minutes to Hillestorp. (or something like that)
- Of course, depending on how fast you drive.
- You're not saying.... Interesting.....
Line ferry to MalmönWell, the taxi driver must have been over social, or not have had anyone to talk to for ages. She went on and on about all kind of obvious stuff. I had to stop for a diet drink just to rest my ears. My friend's friend called when I was in the convenient store. They were waiting in Hillestorp. (or something like that)
- I will be there in 10 minutes. I was told it was a 10 minutes ride when it's almost 30 minutes.
- No worries, we're waiting here.

Arriving to Hillestorp (or something like that) and I became a worried man. My friend told me that they would be 4 in the car. When I arrived there were plenty people around the car. One friend was passing with the bus so she joined us in the car and one of the girls was not going with us. So we were 6 people in the car when we left Hillestorp. (or something like that).
Well, thanks to our Cook and my successful diet it was no problem.
On the way onboard the ferry
On the way onboard the ferry
Boarding the ferry to Malmön
It didn't took long for us to reach the ferry to Malmön. we had to wait for a few minutes before Malmönthe ferry arrived and we could board the ferry. We had been a little worried about the midsummer traffic. But there was not many cars on the roads and we could make good speed.

The ferry ride lasted for about 10 minutes. It's a free service so you can't expect any excitements on the boat and 10 minutes is more than enough. We arrived to my friend�s house 10 minutes after leaving the ferry.

There had been some major improvements on the house since I was here last time. My friend had changed most of the stuff. New kitchen, shower, roof, funnel and the whole house was in good condition and it looked good. He had also built a new guest house next to the house. But the Swedish flag was missing on top of the flag pole.
Time to hoist the Swedish flag
Time to hoist the Swedish flag
Get it up already!
My friend was quick to get a new flag and well, he wasn't that quick to get it up. But I was pestering him and taking pictures so maybe we can blame me for the extra time spent getting up the flag. But when the flag finally was flying it looked good.
Time to hoist the Swedish flag
Time to hoist the Swedish flag
Time to hoist the Swedish flag
Get it up already!
It was raining when we left Preemraff in Brofjorden and it lasted for 5 minutes. The strong wind from yesterday was gone and when the sun broke through the clouds it was a nice day. But the sky looked black around us so rain was expected any minute. We were lucky, no rain and it was a nice afternoon on Malmön.
But the ship was always on my mind and I find it hard to relax when off the ship.
Midsummer dinner
Midsummer dinner
My friend climbing around taking pictures at the dinner
My friend�s wife and mother had been busy all day cooking and dinner was ready not long after our arrival. I had our Cook and my diet in mind all the time so I was easy on the food.

It was very good food and my friend's wife asked me if the Jansson's Frestelse was good.
Malmön- It's the first time I eat Jansson's Frestelse and it's good.
I could hear the reaction from the guests around the table. “Your not Swedish until you have been eating Jansson's Frestelse”
- I'm from Skåne!
- Why don't you eat Jansson's Frestelse?
- I don't like anchovy!

New potatoes, delicious. I haven�t had new potatoes in quite a few years. We only get them in the summer and of course. They are ready in Skåne first. I could not help myself, so I asked if it was new potatoes from Skåne.
Strawberries and whipped cream ( I only took, well, very little) and I felt good about the dinner. Our Dare Devil made it in timeVery nice and I managed to stick to small helpings. I can imagine his family gaping at me in disbelieve if I had lost control at the dinner table. But again, I had our Cook's wrath in mind all the time and that helped me stay focused on my diet. 16 holes in the belt is nothing you want to go down the drain with the help of whipped cream.
And of course my Teachers back home. Coming back to school and they will be cross-eyed wondering:
- WHO IS THIS DASHING YOUNG LAD??!!

Well, time turned quick and it was soon time to return to the ship. Me and my friend left so we could catch the 16:30 ferry. We ended up behind a Norwegian car driving, well, they kept the speed limit. Speed limit 30km/h and we would never Soon back on the shipmake it to the ferry. And the roads on this small island don't allow for any overtaking. If you meet a car you have to go out in the ditch to be able to pass each other. And of course, midsummer and the roads were full of people going to. Yeah, what the hell do I know, but they had flowers in their hair and it seemed like everyone was walking in the same direction.
My friend did an Dare Devil overtaking and when we reached the ferry they were closing the road barrier. But when they saw us they opened again and we were on the ferry.
- Hope the Norwegian slowpoke miss the ferry!
Well, we could see the slowcoach approaching the ferry in our rear view mirror and they opened the road Soon back on the shipbarrier for a second time. Well, the slowcoach would have missed the ferry if it wasn't for us delaying the ferry for a minute. Did we get any thanks? No, they were only staring at us angrily. Do we care?
- Motherf@ckers! You're better off staying in Norway if you're going to fart along in 30km/h!

We made a stop on the way to Preemraff to buy diet drinks and strawberries. We arrived to Preemraff 05:15 when the 2nd Officer on the watch called me on the phone. - We just completed loading.
- Good, I'm at the gate.
I said goodbye and thank you to my friend and he took off towards Malmön with a roaring engine, and I took the 3 minutes� walk to jetty #5 where they were busy disconnecting the cargo arm from manifold #7. Good, and we have managed to discharge sludge and slop and the Engine department had bunkered TärnvågDO and HFO during the day.

Stepping over the gangway and the AB on watch started to scream, well, actually he started when I was approaching on the jetty.
- Nice shirt!
Yeah, I'm used to it by now. It was a wee bit different when I went ashore, the crew turned bananas when they spotted me.
- What the he** are you wearing?
- Are you going to a masquerade?
Well, and this was my most inconspicuous shirt. My friend's older relatives was attending the dinner and I didn't want any of them to go in to chock. And with my experience of getting blamed for everything I preferred to keep a low profile.

But it was interesting to observe how the crew canalized their envy. I'm always used to hear “What a nice shirt” and that�s even when I pass people talking to each other in FUNKY TOWN. They don't think I understand them.
- Psst, Look at the dashing young guy approaching. WHAT A NICE SHIRT!

But obviously the crew couldn't handle their envy (except the AB on the manifold) and it was canalized in to vex and bullying.

Well, anyway, coming onboard and I went straight to the bridge. OK, I made a quick stop in the Mess room to get a wine glass for my diet drinks. I meet our new AB.
- I was with you on Tärnsund 2000, he said.
- OK, I don't remember you, I answered.
We also had a new 2nd Officer (Brought me and the other 2nd Officer tea cups BIG SIZE ) and our new Captain. We also have a new 1st Engineer but he was not in the Mess room.

I helped our 2nd Officer with the paperwork and I was off to my cabin for a diet drink. Pilot ordered for 7 o'clock and we had just left the Pilot behind when I came on my watch at 8 o'clock.
Leaving Brofjorden behind and this had been my best visit to Brofjorden I ever have had in 25 years. Thanks� to my friend and his family.

Saturday 20th of June 2009 and we were SW bound West of Denmark when I came on my morning watch. We will be at Sunk Pilot tomorrow before lunch (Weather permitted). But we will drop anchor until the 22nd. I don't mind, we have stuff to do on deck.

My Thai studies was neglected yesterday and I had to attend to my books today, start after lunch. First time using the wine glassI had been eating too much spinach during lunch and I was soon asleep on my bed.

I was in the Mess room at 17:30, half an hour late for the dinner. (ON PURPOSE) All the food was removed from the Mess room and thus there
Pumpernickel
the word, was used as an insult in both Germany and Sweden. In Sweden from the 18th century. If you read Nationalencyklopedin they think that they started to call the bread for Pumpernickel because of the effect the bread has on your digestion.


Pumpernickel means a person that is clumsy, ungainly in German dialect. Pumper= fart and Nickel is disparaging for Nikolaus. Or as our German Captain on Pegasus said:
- A farting Santa Claus!

Pumpernickel is dark, dense German bread made from coarsely ground whole meal rye. Originally from Westphalia in Germany.

Hmm, I though they called me Pumpernickel because of my healthy lifestyle.
was nothing left for me to see. OK, you're saying that self discipline and self control would be much better and I hear you. But it's better if there is no temptations lying around when I'm around.

I had my dinner with our Cook, she had made a delicious with chicken. When I was ready I prepared my breakfast, today with knäckeböd. This morning I had black bread that our Captain had brought from Latvia and it was very good. Our Cook tried to order Pumpernickel for us, but the Ship chandler was not able to provide us with Pumpernickel.
I was back in my cabin in a jiff, plenty Thai studies to make good. And again, thanks to my friend I was able to do my studies drinking Diet Drink from a nice wine glass.

- AND HEY! BEFORE CONTINUING WITH MY THAI STUDIES I JUST WANT TO TELL YOU THAT I WENT FOR DINNER WITH 17 HOLES IN MY BELT!

Sunday 21st of June 2009 and we dropped anchor at Sunk anchorage at 0955. Still no internet. The guy from FURUNO called yesterday evening about the internet. He must have a really nice job. It's the same on all the ships I have been on with the SeaIt system. It never works and the guy at FURUNO must receive 100 complains every day. And he receives the same complains every day because it is never getting any better. So, well, at least I would have been going crazy after just a few days.

But I heard that Tärntank will try a new system and if the new system is better the poor guy at FURUNO will soon be out of work. Yeah, you're always better off getting a job at a company delivering high quality equipment. SeaIt has failed to supply the shipping industry with internet and I hope they are running out of business.

Berthing prospects, early morning 22nd and we will stay at the anchorage tomorrow. Good I have Barcarolleprepared our deck Cadet and the smallest 2nd Officer for the tank inspection of DB 3P/S tomorrow. Yeah, you got it right, the smallest 2nd Officer onboard. On my previous ships we
Before
After
walked around in the double bottom, but I'm afraid that will be impossible here.

Well, if I continue my diet it might be possible for me to go down next month. And talking about success, my diet. Today I tried to hide 2 new potatoes under the salmon. Our Cook exploded.
- DON'T EAT THEM!!!!!
- Who the hell put the potato in the salmon? You should have told me that there was potato in Bro Promotionthe salmon and I would have skipped the salmon!
- DON'T TRY WITH ME!!!!!
So, yeah, I'm pretty confident that I will look great when it's time to go home.

Well, where the hell where we? I got lost there, sorry for that. Hmm, yeah, our deck Cadet. I gave him a book yesterday that he should read about tank inspection and coating. When he was ready our 2nd Officer took the book and now they are ready for some tank inspection extravaganza.
Our 2nd Officer will soon be Chief Officer so it's good for him to get some practice. And they are eager to learn, both the 2nd Officer and Deck Cadet were enthusiastic when I told them about the tank inspection and the gas meters.
- Psst, I think it was the gas meters that made them enthusiastic and not the tank inspection.

So tomorrow I will show them how to calibrate the gas meters and fill up Enclose Space Entry Permit and when we're ready we will fill up the tank inspection report and they will soon be ready to become Chief Officers.

And today we added a job in Consultas. “Pre Entry Calibration” so Vetting Inspectors can see that we have calibrated the gas meters before use.

Monday 22nd of June 2009 and I discovered a gorgeous day when I came on my morning watch. Sunshine and the sea were like a mirror. Good, we have plenty to do and I will start right off after my tea and prepared breakfast to check one of the pumps to the stripping valve in 6 Port.
In our pipe tunnel
In the pipe tunnel
AB & Chief Engineer
Captain on the bridge and I went down to meet our Chief Engineer and the AB on watch in the duty mess. We went down to the pipe trunk to check out the stripping valve. We open and close the Tärnvågvalve with a hydraulic pump and now it seems to be a problem with the hand pump.

We brought our Chief Engineer as a “Technical Advisor”. Well, there is something wrong with the pump and we brought our spare pump from forward and 90 minutes after coming down the new hand pump was mounted and the stripping valve is working again.

I was back on the bridge a few minutes later and it didn't take me long before I had a cuppa in my hand. And 30 Tärnvågminutes later our AB brought the old hand pump in a wood box so I can sent it ashore for service next time in Sweden.

Time turns quick when you're busy and 2nd Officer was on the bridge preparing his tea before I knew it. Our Deck Cadet was on the bridge as well and we calibrated the gas Tärnvågdetectors and I drilled them about the difference between LEL% and VOL%.

We meet on the bridge after lunch and we filled up Enclosed Space entry Permits and I filled up our PRE ENTRY CALIBRATION in Consultas. New job # 379.00.01 in Consultas.

It was almost 3 o'clock when they returned to the bridge. The double bottom looks like new and nothing else was expected.

Our Deck Cadet had kept himself busy with the mob boat before lunch trying to locate the leak on the air filled fender around the boat. Nothing to be found and he had to take of the whole fender and he discovered a big hole, most likely from lifting up the boat last time.
MOB boat onboard Tärnvåg
2nd Officer enjoying the sunshine while taking the inventory in the MOB boat
So while they were in the double bottom the other 2nd Officer took the inventory of the MOB boat trying to find the repair kit and when they returned from the double bottom we had the kit on the bridge. Just for our Deck Cadet to go from one important job to the next.

Busy all day and I was late for my Thai studies so the first thing I did after my shower was to open my books.

Coming on my night watch and the weather was still gorgeous. I enjoyed my night watch with tea and my Thai training CD. Well, at least my intention was to improve my Thai. But Captain and the AB came to the bridge and they talked and talked and it was midnight before I had a chance to do very much with my training CD.

Tuesday 23rd of June 2009 and still anchored when I came on my morning watch. Good morning tea and my prepared breakfast. But today I have changed the knäckebröd for 2 slices of our Cook's Tärnvågnew bread. Same style as our Cook on Bro Promotion made. Plenty nuts, sun flower seeds, linseeds and not very much of the unhealthy stuff.
Well, as I said to our Cook:
- It's a clear 9 out of 10 possible.
- What's wrong with the bread??!!
- Remove the raisins and it will be a full 10!

Beautiful morning and the watch disappeared quickly while I was watching the crew chipping and painting on deck. I will purge the Tärnvågair pipes for the level gauging system for the ballast tanks after lunch. This is a good opportunity for our Deck Cadet to get some hands on experience. He finished reading the manuals yesterday so he has a hint of what it was all about.

We will only test our water tanks and draft gauges. If we test the bunker tanks there will be alarms. So the engine department do their own tanks and they know what all the Tärnvågalarms is all about. But, well, when we did the potable water tank the alarm went off and our 1st Engineer was on the scene within seconds.
- Great, you can show me how to do!
I told our Deck Cadet to show our 1st Engineer the secrets and we were soon done testing the bunker tanks as well.

When we came out to the ECR our 1st Engineer thanked our Deck Cadet and it was now a 10 minutes job turned in to a 90 minutes job. Suddenly we were talking about the good old days and the stories went even juicier when our Chief Engineer joined us in the ECR. Suddenly it was 2 o'clock and I have my Thai books in my cabin to attend to. For sure, sitting around on my arse all day long will not impress my Teachers back home.

Pilot will board us at 18:30 ST and we expect to be alongside around midnight. We also received voyage instructions for our next voyage today, Brofjorden to Amsterdam with a full cargo of ULSD. We will be well in to July when we finish the Amsterdam voyage and I'm soon back home in FUNKY TOWN.
School, gym and disco are what I'm looking forward to.

We had Pilot onboard when I came on my night watch. We expect to be at the jetty around 2330 or a little later so I had a few hours to kill. Drinking tea while telling Cock-and-bull stories with the Pilot and Captain and time turned much quicker than expected. I was on the fo'c's'le when I was relieved by our 2nd Officer 10 minutes before midnight.

So I continued to do our pre CARGO HANDLING check list and I was off to the bridge to fill up the check list and I was back in my cabin 30 minutes after midnight.

Wednesday 24th of June 2009 and we started the discharging when I came on my morning watch. Beautiful morning and could enjoy my tea watching the sunny surroundings. Our Deck Cadet was on the bridge so I gave him a few pointers on starting up discharging.

Coming back from dinner I discovered that we had internet connection and I tried to upload my web page. But the connection is slower than slow so we see how it goes.

Thursday 25th of June 2009 and our 2nd Officer forgot to wake me up in time. Good, I got an extra 30 minutes sleep and when I woke up I could not hear the engine. So we must have been delayed. When I went off my watch at midnight yesterday they stopped discharging for about
“2 hours”. So I expected us to be on the way when I woke up. But I could see 2nd Officer on the fo'c's'le letting go our mooring lines when I looked out my window. I went to the bridge for my morning tea and my prepared breakfast just in time to see them let go our last lines at 08:20.

I spent the whole off my watch with our Pilot from South Africa. We were talking about the good ol' days and time went pretty quick.
Evening exercise
Evening exercise
Our Cook and Deck Cadet
Well, I'm back in my f@cked up circadian rhythm. I can't sleep during the night and I'm dead tired in the afternoon. But I managed to wake up in time for dinner, salad only. After dinner I went on deck for my constitutional and our Cook and Deck Cadet was exercising on deck. I wish I could join them but my right foot hurts again.

But I showed them a few moves from back in the days when I was a boxer. They were impressed and disappointed that I could not join them on deck.

While they were kickin' ass on deck I was in my track kickin' ass. Well, it was more like I was limpingback and forth on deck. I gave it 30 minutes before I returned to my cabin and it was soon time for my watch.

Friday 26th of June 2009 and I discovered a gloomy day when I came on my morning watch. The wind had picked up a little bit. Blowing from NE and it was only 14°C. Not exactly the summer Tärnvågwe're wishing for.

But I had my morning tea while our AB on watch changed gasket in a leaking fire pipe. Our OS helped him and when they were ready our OS continued with painting and chipping.

We held a “Grounding drill” after lunch, deck department on the bridge and engine department in the ECR and at 1 o'clock should have our SMS meeting on the bridge.

While waiting for the engine department the AB on my Tärnvågwatch told us a story from back in the days. He had been on a sailing boat a few years back.

There had been 6 Captains onboard sailing for the pleasure of it. Well, they ran aground and they told the AB on my watch not to tell anyone about the embarrassing incident.
- Well, that�s' why they made it against the law to drink while driving a boat, I said.

Our engine department was on the bridge just after 1 o'clock and we could start the SMS meeting. It took some 30 minutes to discuss old safety issues and new issues about the safety and security.

When we were ready I told the crew that it was picture time. I think it's the first time I have all crew together and I can as well take the opportunity. And, especially, our 2nd Officer on the 4 to 8 watch is excited over the opportunity to be famous in the internet.
On the way to Brofjorden
A-Team  
Seems like we will be delayed in Amsterdam, yeah, it's changed back to Amsterdam. First voyage order was Brofjorden to Amsterdam. Then they changed it to Rotterdam and now it's back to Amsterdam. But Captain told me that we might have to wait until the 2nd of July before we could discharge.
- There is a ship and we will go in when they are ready 1st of July.

Back in my cabin and I discovered that I had network connection. Didn't take long before I had my friend on the phone. He has his boat seaborne and he asked if he could come to pick me up tomorrow.
- I will ask the terminal tomorrow morning, I said.
We will be at the pilot station around 1 o'clock tomorrow morning and I expect us to be loading ULSD when I'm coming on my watch tomorrow morning. It would be nice to spend a few hours with my friend tomorrow afternoon.

Saturday 27th of June 2009 and we were loading when I came on my morning watch. I made my tea and I turned on some music. Swedish radio P3 and it was the usual Top 10 Pop bull shit music. I Loading in Brofjordencould stand it for 5 minutes and I changed to P1. (The old peoples channel) Only talk and news, but I found myself listening to P1 the last few years. If you had told me that I would be listening to P1 a few years ago I would have taken you for a crazy one.

Sunshine and according to the forecast it would be 22 - Loading in Brofjorden30° during the day. I called Brofjorden Terminal and I asked if my friend could come pick me up with his boat.
- No problem! He can stay at the oil spill equipment jetty.
Loading in Brofjorden- Great! Thanks�!

My friend arrived 10 minutes before 12 and he was on the bridge when I topped up 1P/S.

Never leave your watch while topping up Loading in Brofjordentanks, but 5 minutes after 12 o'clock 1P/S was topped and I could leave the bridge with my friend. I changed shirt and the crew found it hard not to show how nice they thought my shirt was.
- What the....??!!
Our Cook begged for a picture of me in my shirt.

Of course I said no but my friend brought his camera Loading in Brofjordenand I could not believe my eyes when he took out the camera from his pocket. Our Cook was sitting next to me and she was nagging on my friend about e-mailing the pictures.

- Let's get out of here! I suggested and we left for his boat.
I gave him 2 bottles of Vodka that he had in a plastic bag and I stuffed them in the boat and we were ready to take off for some summer adventures in the archipelago.
Tärnvåg
Leaving Brofjorden and Tärnvåg behind

Tärnvåg
Leaving Brofjorden and Tärnvåg behind
My friend didn't feel so good, he had sinusitis and he asked if we could take the car from Malmön to Smögen. If it's windy it better to take the car.
- No problem!
It took us about 15 to 20 minutes to get to Malmön and it was a beautiful day. But of course, when you stay on the bridge on a tanker the sea looks like a mirror. But when you go in to a small boat it�s totally different. It was a bumpy road from Brofjorden to Malmön, especially when we had swell from other boats coming our way.
Bohuslän
Before returning to the marina and my friend's car on Malmön we stopped for gasoline and a diet drink on the other side of Malmön's marina. The bunker station was pretty much like any gas stop First stop Malmön bunker stationashore, the main difference was that they had boats on both sides of the pumps instead of cars.

We tied the boat to the bridge and I went to explore the area while my friend was filling up the boat. I spotted the ice cream advertisement from the bridge and Swedish summer without ice cream is not what I call a summer. But I have our lunch and our Cook fresh in mind.

My friend was eating Falususage and I tried to take the smallest piece of Falususage I ever had in my life. Well, I had misjudged our Cook a wee bit, no chance that she would miss my move.
- SALAD ONLY!!
So I skipped the ice cream and I bought a diet drink. Next hole in my belt is number 19. I'm presently at 17 but next hole is a “Double” hole so I need to push my diet a little extra to get next hole in the same speed as it was between the ordinary holes. Otherwise I can get the feeling of “nothing happening” and then it's easy to give up.
Bohuslän
We finished bunkering and we left the bunker station behind. It was gorgeous weather and my friend decided to take the boat to Kungshamn and Smögen instead of the car.
We passed the ferry North of Malmön. Yeah, the very same ferry we took on Midsummer to get from the mainland to Malmön.
Bohuslän
There were plenty sailing boats, motor boats and water scooters on the sea. My friend told me that we were on the water highway going from Göteborg to Strömstad. In the summer time this route is full of leisure boats.
The water highway is passing Brofjorden and in the summertime it�s easy to get the feeling of passing through a wall of leisure boats when coming in to Brofjorden.
Bohuslän
On the way to Strömstad they stop at Marstrand, Lysekil, Malmön, Kungshamn, Smögen and Fjällbacka and they stop at all the places to explore the night life. And there is plenty night life during the summer. Of course they have to live in their boats, during summer it's impossible to get any hotel room in any of those places.
And if you by chance find an vacancy (The chance to win the lottery is greater) they will charge you a fortune. At winter time f@ck all is happening around those places Kungshamnand they turn from small FUNKY TOWNS to ghost towns in August.

We were entrusted with a tusk by our Chief Engineer when we left Tärnvåg. He wanted me to put a bet on the horses.
- If you pass a place before 2 o'clock.
- OK, but I pay half and we share, I demanded.
KungshamnWould be nice to go ashore betting on the horses for him if he wins millions and I have to sit by watching. I don't mind playing the lottery and stuff for the crew when I go ashore.

But I always pay half of the bet just in case. It was just after 1 o'clock when we approached Kungshamn and we stopped in the marina close to the small city centre. Yeah, the Kungshamnmarina was full of leisure boats but we got lucky and we found a small space 2 minutes walk from the shop. On the way to the shopping area we passed all the boats and the people were sitting on deck drinking wine and beer. So I guess some of them will miss Saturday night passed out onboard their boats.

And yeah, I'm talking out of own experience. Drinking wine 1 o'clock and you have the concrete hat on before 7 o'clock in the evening.

Well, we started by putting the bet on the horses and after that we went to buy some diet drinks. We bought the whole stock of Diet MAX and I was happy that I brought my friend to help me carry the darn bottles.

Coming back to his boat and we filled up all the storage space onboard with my diet drinks. Talking about brimmed, I had to sit on the hatch to keep it closed. But now I have diet drinks to last me for a few days.

Across from the marina was the island Hasselön where my friend's cousin lived. My friend was going to deliver a pair of shoes to his cousin and it took us 3 minutes to cross the strait between the mainland and Hasselön. We arrived to a beautiful place and this is exactly how it must have looked around here hundreds of years ago.
Tärnvåg
We left the shoes and we were back in the boat after a few minutes.
- We're not allowed to stay here with the boat, my friend said.
- We can pretend that we're from Norway and understand f@ck all, I suggested.
Bohuslän
From Hasselön it's about 10 minutes. And of course, as my taxi driver cleverly explained it for me back in Midsummer when I was on my way to my friend.
- It depends on how fast you're driving!
Smögen
Smögen might be the most popular and famous place in Bohuslän. In the winter, a population of 2, maybe 3. But in the summer there are millions of people around. We could see that it was crowded when we approached Smögen and it's not even July. In July, when they close Sweden for the holiday this place is really crowded and the locals making a lot of money and it's necessary to make a lot of it to be able to survive the long winter with no tourists. But they are still complaining when the jet set arrives.
Smögen
So of course, the more the tourists drink and misbehave the more money they make.
Smögen
But of course, as our Pilot said later on in the evening when we left Brofjorden.
- The tourists are pissing and shitting in their gardens.
So I can understand some of the complains. But 24/7 of loud music and drunken people everywhere kinds of comes with the territory.
Smögen
Well, we entered the small cove, I think its called Smögens gattet or something like that. Speed limit 3 or 5 knots and we cruised by Smögen water front looking at people and the girls.
Smögen
My friend wanted to buy a cap and it would have been nice to have a walk at the water front, but there wasn't much space for our boat and we skipped the project.
Smögen
OK, it would have been nice with an ice cream, but I think we were better off in my friend's boat. We got a really nice view of Smögen without having to run around with all the people.
Smögen
And the best thing, I don't have to run in to any temptations with all the restaurants along the water front. We enjoyed the sight cruising along in 3 knots.
Smögen
Well, coming closer to the head of the bay or clove the houses got more spread out and in the end it was only old fishing sheds.
Smögen
This old fishing sheds are, well, not for living in them. But today many of them are furnished. But it's not allowed to have any connection to the sewage system or any running water. I don't know if it's due to the taxes. But these fishing sheds are worth millions even if you�re not allowed to live in them. And without the connection to the sewage system or any running water the IRS can't demand any taxes. But of course people are living in them.
Smögen
At the head of the bay we turned around and my friend told me that back in the days, during the midsummer festivities the head of the bay used to be full of empty beer and liquor bottles.
- They reached 50 meters out in the bay.
Smögen
Coming out from the bay or clove we turned to port and we explored the small clove South of Smögen. We passed the Sea Rescue Station and they are very busy during the holiday. People are drinking and driving their boats.
Smögen
I read in the news paper that most of the people drowning should have been saved by a life jacket. Or as one of the guys at the Sea rescue Service said to the reporter when he asked if it wasn't due to alcohol that most of the people drowns.
- Well, you drink one beer and you're falling in to the sea and drown. One beer and he as alcohol in his blood. But is it because of the small amount of alcohol or the fact that he didn't wore a life jacket that killed him?
Well, one thing is for sure. A lot of life would be saved if they were using a life jacket. And of course they should stay away from the boat when they are drunk. But coming from the disco walking along the water front, wearing a life jacket? I don't think so, but it's easy to fall over the edge and in to a certain death in the water.
Smögen
- ONE MORE PICTURE FROM SMÖGEN AND I JUMP OVERBOAD WITH OUT THE LIFE JACKET!!
- OK, I get your drift!

We returned to Malmön and my friend's car. Passing between Smögen and Kungshamn we could see the rocks full of people sunbathing and swimming. But it was only about 18°C in the water so of course you had to be a real enthusiast to get in to the water. We also saw people at the small islets sunbathing with their boats tied up at the rocks. And of Malmöncourse plenty leisure boats when we followed the water highway South towards Malmön.

Arriving to Malmön and we found that the shop was closed so we went to a restaurant and we bought a few sandwiches before going to my friend's home and his wife. I took the opportunity to use the On the way back to the shipbathroom at the restaurant.

A full day of drinking diet drinks in Bohuslän's archipelago and I was almost pissin' myself. We had our sandwiches at my friend's house and it was soon time to return to Brofjorden and Tärnvåg.
It had been a very nice day thanks� to my friend and his wife.

Coming back onboard everyone made big eyes when they saw all my diet drinks. Well, as I said to Captain.
- It's the same story on all my ships. People making remarks about my diet drink. But if someone is drinking 2 cases of beer per day they say f@ck all.

I was onboard just after 5 and I was on the bridge at 7 assisting 2nd Officer to complete the loading. We completed loading at 19:30 and we left Brofjorden just after 10 o'clock in the evening.
Sunday 28th of June 2009 and we were South bound West of Denmark when I came on my morning watch. A beautiful and calm morning on the North Sea with sunshine. Coming on my watch and I was very tired. Not from the lack of sleep. But it felt like I was drained of all my power.

When I got off my watch yesterday I could hardly talk, I was so hoarse so I had to take some Stepsils. Maybe I had some fever as well, but this morning I was really exhausted.
- Hmm, maybe it was due to our adventure yesterday?
But I slept all afternoon and when I woke up I was full of vigour again.

Monday 29th of June 2009 and I could see 2nd Officer on the fo�c�s�le when I had my good morning look out of my window at 08:40. 20 seconds after receiving my wakeup call and 4 seconds after my vitamin pill.

2nd Officer was back on the bridge when I arrived at 8 o'clock so I didn't had to go forward to relieve him on the fo'c's'le. I could get right on to my good morning tea arrangement.

A gorgeous morning and the crew were painting on deck and she will soon look nice again. Poop deck is finished and tank deck will Amsterdam anchoragesoon be ready. Weather permitted. I will have one of the ABs to start with the superstructure tomorrow.

Better that they get their own areas and we can keep track on the progress and how many layers of paint there is. Otherwise Amsterdam anchorage there will be spots with 6 layers and some spots with only 2 layers.

Well, things are in progress and arses are kicked on deck. Strange, we're only 3 ABs and 1 extra OS. No time between ports and we find the time to keep the ship free from rust. I have been on ships with 6 ABs and weeks between ports and everything is rusted to pieces and the paint work has left much more than a little to wish for.
At least I'm confident that this ship will look nice when the summer is behind us. Of course, this is weather permitted. But we don't expect it to rain for a whole summer.
Amsterdam anchorage
Amsterdam anchorage
Amsterdam anchorage
Our OS is painting on deck
Coming for lunch and I discovered that my friend's visit Saturday lunch had made some impact onboard, at least on our 2nd Officer. My friend he put cheese on the sausage and, well, don't tell the company. But today our 2nd Officer put cheese on his meat.
- What about your diet? I asked.
Well, my diet got a list as well, chicken soup and there were potatoes in the soup. But it was delicious.

Latest berthing prospects is that we will go inside after M/T Tower Bridge. A tanker on about 40-50000 DWT. She left the anchorage around 10 o'clock in the evening so it looks like it will be our turn on the 1st of July, late evening.

Tuesday 30th of June 2009 and, well, June is coming to an end with a gloomy and grey weather. Foggy and cold when I came on my morning watch. But the weather allowed for chipping on deck and I watched the OS and AB on watch chipping on tank deck.

Next cargo is gasoline and we will use the vapor return in Göteborg when loading next time. So the AB drained the vapor return line from condensed water. One more check before arrival to Göteborg and we're ready to go. The shore people tend to be a little grumpy if they discover water and cargo residues in the vapor return line when they connect the arm.

Time to swing over to July 2009. (Soon time for me to sign off)



       
                  
OK, it has come to my knowledge that we have senior citizens at my web page. How hard can it be? So it's not very easy for them to see the blue coloured links to the next page.
Jiffy (also jiff)

noun [in SING.] informal a moment: we'll be back in a jiffy.

ORIGIN late 18th cent.: of unknown origin.

So as you understand, in a jiff pretty much depends on your internet.
So I put a “Next” button here and I hope that there isn't any problem to understand how to use that one. So just CLICK the “Next” button on your left hand side and you will be on the next page in a jiff!

Faites vous parlez le français? Pour arriver à la page suivante faites s'il vous plaît un déclic le bouton “Next” ci-dessus!

Haga usted dice el español? Ver la siguiente página sólo hacer clic el botón “Next” encima!

Farla parla l'italiano? Per vedere la prossima pagina lo scatto per favore giusto Il bottone “Next” sopra

Sprechen sie Deutsch! Kein problem! Wenn Sie die folgende Seite sehen wollen gerade klicken der Knopf “Next” oben!

คุณพูดภาษาไทยได้ไหม ไม่มีปัญหา ถ้าคุณต้องการไปหน้าถัดไป ให้กดปุ่ม “Next” ข้างบนนี้

E ni Svenskar och inte förstår Engelska så ska ni skämmas. J och Björn, med det menar jag inte att alla mina stavfel ska ältas varje g'ng vi träffas.





                                       

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