September 2011

Thursday 1st of September 2011 and we completed discharging 7 minutes past midnight and we finished our ballast at 01:40. 50000 tons of water in the ship and we're ready to shift from jetty #1 to jetty #14 where we will stay until Monday.

Pilot had been onboard since 10 minutes past midnight but we didn't expected to leave until
Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgrid2 o'clock due to lack of shore personnel. I don't know what kept them busy, maybe a ship movement. But I could not see any ships leaving or arriving to Mongstad.

We called the crew STAND-BY for 2 o'clock and I called Chief Officer Jr. I was on the bridge with Captain when Mongstad Control informed us that there would be no departure until between 2 thirty and 3 o'clock. Chief Officer Jr missed valuable sleep, but he Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgridmanaged to catch a quick power nap on the sofa in the CCR.

Our tug boat arrived around quarter to 3 and we commenced the unmooring and we left the jetty just after 3 o'clock. I went to the bridge to put positions in the chart on our trip to jetty 14, about 2,5 NM.

It was a gorgeous morning, but it starts to get cold so it was nice to get up on the bridge, even if it was only for 20 minutes or something.

We approached jetty 14 and I returned to poop deck and it took us about 30 minutes to make fast the ship and we had all fast just before 4 thirty in the morning.

Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgrid

Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgrid
When we were ready with the morning I could see the day light coming over the mountains on the Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgridother side of the fjord. I used my walkie talkie to call our Chief Officer Jr on the fo'c's'le. He was just about to finish the mooring forward.
- What about an “After mooring” Diet MAX?
- See you in the smoke room in 2 minutes'

We enjoyed a Diet MAX in the smoke room and then I was Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgridoff to my cabin for some sleep. I found it a wee bit hard to fall asleep. Most likely due to my extended power nap last evening.

And I'm pretty sure that the “After mooring” Diet MAX didn't did anything to help me fall asleep

Our 2nd officer didn't call me until 12 o'clock so I got a few extra minutes' of valuable sleep. I discovered a gorgeous day when I came down to the mess room, Mongstad at its best. Not many days like this in Mongstad during the year.
Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgrid

Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgrid
Mongstad Terminal's jetty 14 is situated at the far East of the Terminal. The jetty is just next to the Mongstad Base where all the supply ships load their cargoes for the oil fields. Mongstad Base is like a port for supply ships and there are supply ships arriving and departing all the time.

These supply ships looks very small when we meet them at the sea. But up close they are huge and if you remember the pictures of me flying in over Kristiansund you remember the two supply ships moored in the middle of Kristiansund. Next to the houses they look very big.
Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgrid
We had a boat arriving with stores during lunch so this kept me busy until almost 1 thirty in the afternoon and when I was ready I went to the bridge for some paper work. Time went pretty quick Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgridon the bridge and our Chief Officer Jr came to relieve me before I even had had the time to prepare his coffee.

Our Chief Officer Jr told me that we had not received any snus.
- What the
- And we only got 11 cartoons of cigarettes.

He had ordered 150 cartoons of cigarettes but the Norwegian custom are very reluctant to let us buy tax free Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgridtobacco as we only stay inside Norwegian waters.

We went to check out our bonded stores in our Cook's store room on main deck. NO SNUS!

What a setback, no snus delivered and I will have to go to the kiosk outside the gate. Almost 2000 NOK for 20 cans and that is 6000 NOK per month. I use 2 cans per day and I need to get out of Norway, 6000 NOK is the same as 30000 Baht and that is 2 good nights out on town.

Well, thinking of it. It might be possible to stretch to 30000 to last for 3 nights on town since I Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgridgave up booze. Now a day I'm only drinking beer and more money in the valet the day after is not the only perk that comes with drinking beer “ONLY”. I also remember how I got home, I never remembered how I got home back when I was drinking vodka orange juice.

Tax free cigarettes, I don't care very much for the cigarettes, I'm giving up. But I never bothered to buy any tax free cigarettes. If I'm so stupid that I smoke I will have to pay General snuspremium price. But snus, that's a f@cking human right

Well, I'm off to the kiosk, or the store outside the gate tomorrow. There is a new shop and if I'm lucky I might be able to find myself a real tea cup as well.
Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgrid
Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgrid
Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgrid
Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgrid
Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgrid
Tax free cigarettes is not the only thing I don't care about. Chocolate and candy is nothing I care about. We received plenty with the stores today and I'm pretty sure that I won't eat any of it. we have plenty Diet MAX onboard and I won't give up until we have finished them and then I can give up the stupid habit of drinking the Diet MAX.

The crew think I'm born with a deformity, a can of Diet MAX in my hand. I always have a can of Diet MAX in my hand and next thing is to drip-feed myself with the darn thing.
Yeah, that would be something, to walk around deck with drip connected to my arm.
Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgrid
Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgrid
Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgrid
Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgrid
We had our dinner and I went for a power nap and I woke up 10 minutes before 7, plenty time to enjoy myself before our punch bag session at 20 thirty. I was at the punch bag at 20 thirty, I didn't expect our 20 years old Mess Man to show up. He has been “tired” the last 2 days. Yesterday our Mess Man and Cook skipped our punch bag session.
- We have to go ashore. But tomorrow!

But KILLER, where the is killer? I had expected our Cook, Mr “I like the pain” to show up at the punch bag. What a disappointment, here I am pepped to maximum and KILLER is a no show!

I returned to the smoke room and a Diet MAX and I had a chat with our Pump man and Deck Cadet before I returned to my cabin and my web page. The clock had turned 22 thirty when I realised that I hadn't opened my Thai books since, well, quite a few days. Too late today BUT TOMORROW........

Thai books or bust. I felt bad about skipping my Thai studies so I finished my books before
relieving our 2nd Officer at midnight. Well, a waste of time, no one understand when I'm trying to speak Thai and I can't help but wondering how much money and time I have wasted on Thai lessons and books during the years. Believe me, it adds up.

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Friday 2nd of September 2011 and I spent the whole morning watch in front of the computer. Our Chief Officer Jr came to relieve me at 4 and we had a chat about the good ol' times until 5 o'clock when I Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgridleft for my bed. Well, not exactly, I put down some drivel on my web page and it was almost 6 when I got to bed and it was almost 7 thirty before I managed to fall asleep.

But I was full of vim when 2nd Officer called me 20 minutes after 11 for my afternoon watch. There were some oil spill ships working next to us and Captain told me that the South African President was in Norway and there was a delegation coming to Mongstad to look at oil spill equipment.

My guess is that the Norwegian tax payers has to give the South African President a gift before he goes back home. Presidents from this part of the world are only out travelling when they are begging for money. Swedish tax payer sent a lot of money to ANC back in the days. For a good cause, yeah, Dr Mombasa was living in a luxury villa driving luxury cars while the people that needed the money got f@ck all. I cringe.

And no changes since ANC took over the country, when I was in Cape Town they still had the same townships all over the place. But Dr Mombasa, calling himself a priest and Mandela's wife were living the high life. When I was in South Africa there was a lot of hullabaloo about Mandela's wife.
Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgrid
They prepare the oil spill equipment

Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgrid
Equipment to suck up oil from the water

Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgrid
I can imagine the crew swearing over the South African delegation.
My bet is that they would have preferred to sit in the mess room drinking tea

The delegation f@cked off out of there after a few minutes. Exactly at the first sign of rain. Seriously, is there anyone thinking they were interested to stay on the shore watching a tug boat with a machine sucking oil hanging from the side. No, back to the hotel and the free booze and they will hopefully have their pockets full when they arrive back home. And why not stop in Sweden on the way back home.

They are known to hand out money to shady politicians passing by Stockholm.
- Very nice to be here!
- Friendships forever!
- Our countries are the best of friends!
- Here, have a wooden horse as a souvenir from Sweden. And a billion of the tax payers money.
- Are you sure?
- Never mind our schools and hospitals. Dr Mombasa needs a new ride. And if anyone complains we just call them Nazis.

Yes, everyone oppose the governments stupid spending in Scooby Doo countries are just called Nazis and problem solved. No need for any argument or explanation.
- What about our school? Better to spend the money on our future!
- You're a Nazi.....
- And the hospitals, we have senior citizens working all their life paying tax and when they are old they are treated like dirt and you want to send their tax money to Africa
- You're a Nazi.....
- We're exporting all our jobs to Scooby Doo countries and we're importing 50 year old Somalian goat farmers. How will this end? Who will pay?
- You're a simple Nazi and I don't need to explain anything for you.....
And as you're discussing with a Nazi you just have to rise and leave the discussion with no explanation. Who needs to discuss anything with a Nazi?

Well, anyway, back to the ceremony in Stockholm. Dr Mombasa just received a billion and he has a grin from ear to ear while thinking about his new house.
- Thank you! Best of friends! A long tradition....... blah-blah-bla
Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgrid

Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgrid
I had planned to go ashore after my watch. Snus and a manly sized tea cup were on my shopping list. The day started with sunshine but sunshine was soon turning in to gloom and grey. DARN! I had Aladdin's adventure with his Canon D60planned to take some pictures and I don't want to carry 3 kg of Canon camera around my neck when it is raining. It was enough that I dropped my camera in the floor, less than 2 weeks after I bought it.

And yet again I was happy that I didn't buy a Scooby 500 or a Lady 750 camera. My Canon took the fall very well, but the filter got a dent and the glass cracked. I can't remove the Aladdin's adventure with his Canon D60filter so I will have to see Canon service back home in Bangkok. But a filter is 600 Baht, way better than to have to buy a new lens for 30000 Baht or whatever it Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgridwas I paid.

Well, anyway, to carry around the camera in a bag is the best way to miss a good picture. And I don't remember how many of my Canon compact camera I have Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgriddestroyed during my days. But I have managed to get some good pictures and that's the most important with the camera.

4 o'clock in the afternoon and Chief officer Jr and Captain came to the bridge and we talked about the good ol' times and time just disappeared and suddenly it was time for dinner so we went down to the mess room. Obviously our Chief Officer Jr has received Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgridstrict orders from his wife to eat salad and he asked me to take a picture as proof.

I got the picture and he was going to put back the salad and I reacted
forcefully.
- Eh Eh Eh!!

Oh, I just wish I was as good in keeping my own diet on track. I have tuna and SKOVMAND in my cabin and the original plan was that I should have had my dinner on the bridge. But as I had nice Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgridcompany in the mess room I decided to stay to have my dinner in the mess room.

DARN! This job was an offer that I could not refuse. But I should have stayed in Bangkok for another 3 months.

Yes, I need 3 months with Bangkok Fight Club and Chakrit Muay Thai School to get down to normal size.

A ship is a disaster for me, I just don't have the self control that is required when our kitchen staff are Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgridbaking cakes and stuff. Of course, not as good as the cake I made back home in Bangkok.

I finished my dinner and I was about to move in to the smoke room (just for a chat) when Our Cook stopped me. Is this guy for real?

He forced me to have a piece of cake and the worst part is that he had done a lousy job cutting the cake so I got 2 pieces Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgridwhen I wanted ONE piece ONLY. DARN! OK, I can't blame our Cook for the third piece of cake.
- Hmm, our Mess man, can I blame him?

But what about our boxing session tonight. I can't remember our last session at the punch bag. About time to get our arses movin' again.
- Boxing tonight?
- We're going ashore
- Are you serious?

Well, there were 6 of the crew going ashore and it Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgridturned out that our Cook was the tour leader. So I went to look for him in the kitchen for some information. The weather looked better and I could join them to the shop for some snus.

I found our Cook in his store rooms and he told me that they were going to leave at 7.
- What about the boxing?
He started to squeeze his elbow and his face was expressing pain.
- Tomorrow
- If I had a dollar every time I heard tomorrow....
I returned to the smoke room to have a chat with our new Deck Cadet and Chief Officer Jr.
Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgrid
Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgrid
Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgrid
I had one and a half hour before 7 so I went to my cabin to put up the latest drivel on my web Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgridpage. They called me in my cabin 20 minutes past 7.
- YO!
- Our Cook told me to call you
- What time ae we leaving?
- I don't know but our Cook told me to call you
- I'll be down in a jiff!

Our Chief Officer Jr called Mongstad Terminal on CH 11 so they could arrange an transportation for us and I was surprised that the bus came after just a few minutes.

We went down the gangway and the crew was in a hurry to get in to the bus as it was cold and raining. They were running towards the bus, but one of our Mess men was behind.
- HOLD IT!
I asked the crew to stay outside the bus until our last mess man had arrived.
- Picture time! Everyone has to be on the picture before getting on the bus!
Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgrid

Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgrid
We took off with screamin' and smokin' tyres and we had been on our way for 200 meters when I Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgridasked the driver if he could stop so I could take Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgrida picture of the ship. No problem, he stopped and I got off the bus for my pictures and we were soon off towards the gate again.

We stopped to pick up a few workers from the refinery on the way and we arrived to the gate in a Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgridfew minutes. They checked our shore passes and we were outside Statoil's Mongstad Terminal.

I was going to the shop and the crew was going to a restaurant or whatever it was. But first some pictures.

They have a big troll outside the gate and I find it hard to come up with a better souvenir for the crew than a picture with the crew. So I asked them to climb up to the troll before they disappeared to where ever they were going. And as you can see it was raining and there are water drops on my lens. But a picture with water drops is better than no picture at all.
Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgrid
Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgrid
Our crew disappeared to the right and I followed the road leading to the left up the hill and when I reached the intersection I took the wrong turn. I turned left instead of right and I walked down a long hill and there were no sign of any shop. According to the crew the shop was just a few minutes away so I realised that I was on the wrong way. But it was nice with a constitutional and I had Roffe Ruff in my headphones so I was enjoying myself.

And I got to see the beautiful scenery and I also saw our ship. I tried to find a way leading up the hills for a better picture of our ship. But I ended up in a dead end.
Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgrid

Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgrid
I turned around and I walked back up the hill again and I continued straight ahead when I reached Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgridthe intersection. And after 2 minutes I could see the shop on the other side of the roundabout.

And it looked big enough and I was full of hope to find Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgrida real size tea cup. I stepped inside and as soon as I sat foot inside the door my hope to find a cup faded away. Looked like they only had groceries and I was right. I searched the place and I found a shelf with glasses and cups. Plastic wine glasses and some small coffee cups and I Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgridwas not impressed.

I gave up the whole idea and I went to the Cashier to buy snus.
- 10 cans of General, 5 cans of Ettan and 5 cans of Grov snus, please!
Now you have to imagine me speaking my home made Norwegian. I throw in a few “pansar tax” and a “tallefjat” here and there.
- What??!!

Obviously she had a hard time to understand my home made Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T RandgridNorwegian so I threw in a few extra “pansar tax” and “tallefjat”. She looked puzzled but she got the General snus part right. Well, almost, she brought 3 cans.
- 10 cans please
- 3?
By now I had given up my home made Norwegian and I spoke SkåneEnglish with her.
- N0, 10 cans.
- You are from Skåne, right?
- F@cking A!
I got 10 cans of General snus. But the Ettan and Grov snus was a wee bit harder to grasp.
- WHAT DO YOU WANT?
They only had General snus, unless I wanted bagged snus. Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T RandgridSo I asked for 20 cans of General snus and she put all the snus at the cash register.

The snus was cheaper than at Oslo Airport, but 1600 NOK for 20 cans of snus is a daylight robbery. Well, maybe the South African delegation got some of the money to bring back home.

I walked back to the gate and they called for transportation and the bus arrived after 2 minutes and we took off towards DE/T Randgrid at jetty #14. Can't wait to get back onboard to have a Diet MAX

Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgrid

Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgrid
I was up front with the driver and we were talking about the good ol' times when I saw a sign “Warning! Deer!” on the road side.
- Where are the deer coming from?
- They jump over the fence and they walk through the gate

I never said anything, but I was thinking for myself “What would stop a terrorist if a deer can make it over the fence?” And lo and behold, as we were speaking we passed a deer munching on whatever they find yummy.
- STOP!!
The driver stood on the brake and he put the car in reverse so I could get a few pictures of the deer. I was back onboard 10 minutes before 8 and I finished my Thai books before going to relieve 2nd Officer at midnight and I have 4 exciting hours to look forward to.

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Saturday 3rd of September 2011 and I had to spend yet another night watch on the bridge alongside jetty #14 in Mongstad. Well, the time passed pretty quickly and I was soon relieved by Chief Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T RandgridOfficer Jr.

I managed to fall asleep after my watch and I was full of vim when I woke up. I brought a can of tuna and 4 slices of SKOVMAND to the bridge.

I was enjoying my lunch tea when Captain came on the bridge.
- Did you find everything at the shop yesterday?
- I bought snus, but I never found any tea cup.
- Hold on....

He left the bridge and he returned a few minutes later. He handed me a box with a TK tea cup and I put on a kettle first thing to try my new cup. Perfect, now I don't have to worry about going Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgridashore to find a tea cup again.

I finished the passage planning during the afternoon and I hope the cart corrections will come by e-mail tomorrow so I have something to kill tomorrow afternoon with. And I hope that we're leaving Mongstad on Monday or Tuesday. Now I have had enough of waiting alongside jetty #14. But of course, if we have bad weather it is better to stay here than to stay waiting at Heidrun Oil Field. Last winter they had had 22 meters high waves at Heidrun.

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Sunday 4th of September 2011 and who would have thought that I would be saved by chart corrections? It starts to get a wee bit boring alongside jetty #14 in Mongstad by now. But I received chart Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgridcorrections and I managed to keep myself busy during the watch correcting charts.

Luckily enough I managed to fall asleep after my watch. They called me quarter to 10 for life boat muster and fire station muster. I tried to catch 30 minutes of sleep after the drills but I failed to fall asleep so I went to the mess room for some lunch before going on my watch.

I did the Norwegian charts and the T & P notices during the night watch and I did the British charts during the afternoon. Good, I really like the chart corrections and the time is flying by. Suddenly it was time to make coffee for Chief Officer Jr so he has a fresh cup when he relieves me at 4.

He started the watch by filling up a drill logbook and we managed to have a chat about the good ol' times before leaving for dinner. Yeah, my diet has really derailed.
Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgrid

Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgrid
We ran in to one of our Oilers on the way to the mess room and we stopped at my cabin and I gave him one of my Canon compact cameras. The very same Canon that I bought in France when we were loading with M/T Barcarolle in Fos outside Marseille.

I got an e-mail from a friend. She is on the Philippines visiting a friend and she will bring back San Miguel Lights for me so now I have something to look forward to when I'm coming back home to Bangkok. Real San Miguel Light. San Miguel Light “made in Thailand” is good, but not even close to as nice as the original San Miguel Light.

Sunday, and I studied my Thai books before going to the bridge. Seems like our GALLEY CREW have given up the boxing so I need to do my Thai studies even though it is Sunday to keep the agony away. Even though it is a waste of time it is better than doing nothing.

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Monday 5th of September 2011 and I spent my night watch backing up our chart correction computer and our Navigation binder on the bridge. Time turned pretty quick and I could soon go to bed. My Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgridafternoon watch was spent reading manuals so time turned pretty quick during the afternoon as well. Here is plenty new equipment to read about so I can fill my time learning about the stuff.

We have 2 HPR and an Artemis in addition to the GPS for positioning ourselves at the offshore installation. When we're loading at the STL (submerged Turret Loading)we're using the HPR and GPS. HPR (Hydro Acoustic Position Reference System) is a transducer, checking our position against fixed transponders on the sea bed. At the STL we need to keep our position to a fixed geographical position due to the fact that the STL are fixed to the bottom.

We use the Artemis when we're loading with the BLS (Bow Loading System). We have an Artemis on the bow and it is measuring the distance to an Artemis located on the buoy so we keep our position relative to the buoy.

Any change in the position gives a signal to our DP that gives a signal to our thrusters and they start work in the direction we need to move to get back in to position, pretty nifty.
Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgrid
Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgrid

Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgrid
Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgrid

Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgrid
Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgrid

Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgrid
Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgrid

Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgrid
Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgrid

Aladdin's adventure in Mongstad while onboard DE/T Randgrid
It has been raining non-stop since we arrived to jetty #14 in Mongstad but today the rain had stopped, well, at least during the afternoon. I even saw the sun and that was a long time ago, but as our 2nd officer said:
- Mongstad, it is considered nice weather as long as the rain comes from above. If it is coming from the side it is bad.
Yes, we have been lucky with the wind so far and I hope we're as lucky until the 14th of September when we're leaving the ship.

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Tuesday 6th of September 2011 and I read a VOC course compendium during my night watch. So time was yet again pretty quick. When I came on my afternoon watch we were waiting for our Pilot. He was ordered for 1 o'clock and I spent the time with the departure checklist while waiting for the pilot. Captain came on the bridge and I asked him about the VOC (Volatile Organic Compounds, at least I think that's what it was) course. I need to do 3 exercises and then we need to send this to the company for a certificate of completion. The compendium is 2 to 3 inches thick.
- Did you read this during the night? Captain asked while measuring the compendium
- Yeah, pretty straight forwards stuff!
Captain gaped at me measuring the compendium a second time
- Did you read this during the night?
Aladdin's adventure onboard DE/T Randgrid
Aladdin's adventure onboard DE/T Randgrid
Aladdin's adventure onboard DE/T Randgrid

Well, he told me to do the exercises and then we would send it to the company and if I manage to get the exercises right and the answers correct I will receive a certificate of completion.

I and many with me have been swearing a lot over the Seagull's computer based training. It is utter crap, and yes, I have yet to find someone to say something different. So I was at least to say sceptic when I opened the VOC compendium while thinking “BULL SHIT”.

Lo and behold, it was a page-turner. Of course, I knew most of the stuff from my gas freeing and tank cleaning operations. But there were plenty new stuff to learn. And I was impressed, they even managed to explain some of the stuff I knew so I had a few of the AHA experiences. It was really fun to read the book and I'm looking forward to do the exercises.
Aladdin's adventure onboard DE/T Randgrid
Aladdin's adventure onboard DE/T Randgrid
Aladdin's adventure onboard DE/T Randgrid

Well, anyway, pilot was onboard 5 minutes past 1 o'clock and we left Mongstad bound for Heidrun Oil Field. And our Deck Cadet is obviously going to be on my watch practising navigation on our way to Heidrun. He came on the bridge a few minutes after departure.

I had him to take positions.
- NO F@CKING GPS!! YOU WILL HAVE TO DO IT OLD SCHOOL!!
Aladdin's adventure onboard DE/T Randgrid
- And no ARPA or we can as well have your 8 years old sister to do the job! EBL and VRM only!
- Don't you like ARPA?
- I love ARPA!
But I have seen more Deck Officers that don't know how plotting and ARPA works than I care for. OLD SCHOOL, that's, how I learnt it and if the ARPA stops working I won't be lost. First we learn how the radar is working and then we can use the ARPA.

I was giving pointers to our Deck Cadet while he took the positions. At first he found it hard, but as I told him:
- It is just practise, after a few times you get the hang of it.
Aladdin's adventure onboard DE/T Randgrid
Crew waiting for the helicopter

Aladdin's adventure onboard DE/T Randgrid
Helicopter arrives to pick up our Pilot

Aladdin's adventure onboard DE/T Randgrid
Helicopter arrives to pick up our Pilot

Aladdin's adventure onboard DE/T Randgrid
Helicopter arrives to pick up our Pilot

Aladdin's adventure onboard DE/T Randgrid
Helicopter arrives to pick up our Pilot

Our Pilot left us at 15:15 and we commenced sea passage at 15:20. We were steaming on an NW'ly course. Gloom and grey for as long as we could see. And fog and rain on top of that didn't made us Aladdin's adventure onboard DE/T Randgridfeel any better. We changed course to 360° just before 4 o'clock and it was time for Chief Officer Jr to relieve us on the bridge and I went on deck with our Pump man to check and test our bilge alarms.

I went to bed for a quick power nap after dinner and I woke up just in time for the slop chest at 8 o'clock. I need snus and 2 packs of fags for our Deck Cadet. Yeah, I borrowed 2 packs from him and now I need to buy a whole carton in order to give him 2 packs. What to do with the remaining 8 packs? I will have to figure something out.
Aladdin's adventure onboard DE/T Randgrid
Aladdin's adventure onboard DE/T Randgrid
I went to the bridge to meet our Chief Officer Jr when he got off his watch at 8. he is in charge for the slop chest and this is thus the guy to stay friendly with. We went don to D-deck so I could get a carton of red Prince and a roll of snus. They only have bagged snus and the Norwegian Custom refused to let us order more snus so I will have to do with the bagges snus.
Better than nothing, and for sure better than smoking.

One of our 2nd Engineers was already waiting outside the slop chest when we came down. We were delirious with anticipation. But the anticipation soon turned in to impatience when our Chief Officer Jr was fumbling with his keys.
- A FER F@CK'S SAKE OPEN THE DARN DOOR ALREADY!
Aladdin's adventure onboard DE/T Randgrid
Aladdin's adventure onboard DE/T Randgrid
Aladdin's adventure onboard DE/T Randgrid
I managed to open the door and I grabbed a carton of Red Prince. Our deck Cadet came around the Aladdin's adventure onboard DE/T Randgridcorner and I stopped him.
- I have 2 packs of fags for you here!
I started to open my carton.
- What the is this??!!
I almost felt on the floor. There was a very grim picture Aladdin's adventure onboard DE/T Randgridon the carton. And what the duck has anyone got hit by a bus have to do with my cigarettes?

Yeah, the guy on the picture looked like he had been hit by a bus.
- Do we have any other cartons?
Our Chief Officer Jr managed to find a carton without any picture and we swapped carton and I gave our deck Cadet his cigarettes and there is no need for me to avoid him anymore.

I have a guy in Bangkok, he lost a 120 000 Baht bet and he gave me 60 000 and now he is avoiding me at all cost.

Embarrassing, I did not even want to make the bet with him, I knew that he was going to lose, but he insisted. And I was right and here we are. Pretty pathetic, avoiding someone for a lousy 60 000 Baht. Just cough up the darn money and get it over with.
Aladdin's adventure onboard DE/T Randgrid
Aladdin's adventure onboard DE/T Randgrid
Aladdin's adventure onboard DE/T Randgrid
I returned to my cabin and I grabbed a Diet MAX and I went down to get a roll of snus on our Aladdin's adventure onboard DE/T RandgridCook's fridge. Coming down on A-deck and the first person I ran in to was our Cook, AKA Mr. “I like the Pain” and our Bosun
- Where are you going?
- To the slop chest
- In the elevator?
- Oh, I'm in pain

I had a quick stop in the smoke room before going down to our Cook's fridge. There was a terrible noise from the crew's day room when I came back to the smoke room.
- What the ? Is someone dying?
I went next door to check it out and our Bosun and Mr. “I like the pain” had returned from the slop chest and now they were singing karaoke.
Aladdin's adventure onboard DE/T Randgrid
I asked them what the they were doing. Our Bosun said that “Killer” was in pain and he liked Aladdin's adventure onboard DE/T Randgridto sing karaoke instead of doing our punch bag session. Killer has obviously caught on and all crew is calling our Cook for “Killer”.

“Killer” asked me where I had been yesterday.
- I was alone at the punch bag!
- Well, what days are we training now? Every Monday with odd date in even months or?
- I did 200 punches times 10 yesterday!
- YEAH-YEAH, BLAH-BLAH!!!
- It is true!

I reminded him of the money he owed me.
Aladdin's adventure onboard DE/T Randgrid- Is it 7 or 800 dollars now?
- What !!?? Do I owe you money? For what?
- Yeah, you have to give me 100 dollars every time I eat cake!
- I never saw you eating any cake!
Aladdin's adventure onboard DE/T Randgrid









Well, if there is going to be any more boxing it will have to be when our other Deck Cadet is returning. And he will hopefully bring new mitts. I have given up on Mr. “I Like the pain”

Aladdin's adventure onboard DE/T Randgrid
Bosun and “Killer” continued with the karaoke and I had a few pictures before I returned to my web page in my cabin. I just had time to finish the drivel about today's adventure when it was time to go to relieve our 2nd Officer on the bridge at midnight. No time for my Thai books, DARN!

+++++++++++++++
Wednesday 7th of September 2011 and coming on my night watch was a disappointment. Our previous 2nd Officer signed off just as I had trained him to remove all cookies and pastries from the bridge before I came on watch. Now our new 2nd Officer leaves cookies behind on the bridge. And that's even though I have begged several times for him to remove the stuff when I'm coming on the bridge.

I found a big red box of cookies when I came on my watch and I asked him to bring it
with him when he left the bridge.
- And please! Don't hide it in your drawer, this was the first place I looked at with our previous 2nd Officer!
- Ah, so you're looking for the cookies!?
- Well, trying to find the cookies is the only excitements during my watches.
Aladdin's adventure onboard DE/T Randgrid
Aladdin's adventure onboard DE/T Randgrid
Aladdin's adventure onboard DE/T Randgrid
I kept our Deck Cadet busy during the watch. Position every 10 minutes and we entered position in the log book every 20 minutes. So time was very quick and I don't know if it was due to all the Aladdin's adventure onboard DE/T Randgridexcitements, but I got a wee bit peckish when the clock turned 3 o'clock.
- Did 2nd Officer bring down the cookies to his cabin?
- Hmm, I don't think so, he must have hide the box on the bridge.
Aladdin's adventure onboard DE/T Randgrid
I took a flashlight and I started to search the bridge and it didn't take me long to find the box. DARN! He had not even bothered to hide it.
Aladdin's adventure onboard DE/T RandgridThe red box with cookies was lying at the stairs leading down to D-deck from the bridge.

I had a few cookies, there is one kind that I liked and I Aladdin's adventure onboard DE/T Randgridtook all of them from the top layer and I was about to close the lid when I decided to lift the top layer and take my favourites from the bottom layer as well. FY!!

We were thought to finish the top layer before starting the bottom layer as children, but as I'm a grownup I can do as I please. Good!
YEAH, IT IS GOOD TO BE 18!

Our Chief Officer Jr came to relieve me at 4 and it took him less than 2 minutes t find the Aladdin's adventure onboard DE/T Randgridcookie jar. And as he is 18 he worked his way straight to the bottom layer.

After the first disappointment discovering that his favourite cookies was finish on the top layer he turned happy when he discovered that his favourites was still remaining at the bottom layer.
- YIPPEE

I left the bridge and I managed to fall asleep pretty quick, good, I expect an afternoon filled with excitements and fun. Arriving to Heidrun Oil Field and we will connect to the STL.

We had passed the 10 nautical miles zone and we were waiting at the 3 nautical miles zone when I came on the bridge 5 minutes before 12 o'clock. We were driving slowly towards the Heidrun DSL 2 and we were going to meet in the coffee room quarter past 12 for a work meeting before going forward to prepare the stuff for the buoy.

Before I left I took a picture of Navion Norvegia and Heidrun Oil Rig when we passed them on our way to the loading buoy. I think Navion Norvegia will be ready on Saturday and we can start load when she is ready. But I will never see us finish loading because I'm out of here on Wednesday.
Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid
We had our work and safety meeting in the coffee room before we went forward to prepare for the STL buoy. As I have described before, the STL buoy comes up in the middle of the ship through a hole in the bottom of the ship. So we need to fill the room with water before we open the hatch in the bottom of the ship.

And how do we get the STL buoy up to our ship. The buoy is about 150 or 200 meters above the sea bed and 60 meters under the surface. Yes, we use a winch to heave up the buoy through the hole at the bottom of the ship. There is a boat coming with the line from the buoy. Then he shoots a rocket to our deck with a line and we hive up the rope from the STL buoy on deck.
- Hmm, sorry, a stupid question. How do get the line from the tank deck down under your ship and then up through the hole in the bottom and up on deck so you can heave up the buoy?

Well, we drop a line through the hole in the middle of the ship. We have two small fishing buoy Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgridattached to the end together with 3 sand bags. When the sand bags reaches 30 or 40 meters below the surface we have a hydrostatic release that releases the sand bags. And yes, it is very important that they are made of natural material. No plastic or any chemicals, all natural.

We swing the boat to starboard and when the sand bags sinks the fishing buoys floats up on the surface and as we swing to starboard the buoys comes up on our ports side.

We throw down a hook to catch the buoys. When the line is on deck we connect it to the line form the buoy and we drop it back in to the sea and we start heaving up the line through the hole again. As soon as we have the line from the buoy on the deck the line is getting thicker and thicker and we have to heave up about 150 meters of line. And when we're finished it is about 140 tones tension on the winch.

It is fun, it is all the latest technology mixed with “drop the sandbag” technique. When the buoy was secured to the ship we started to pump out the water from the STL room and we had our Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgriddinner while waiting. When the STL room was empty we connected the manifold, all hydraulic and we were ready in 5 minutes.

Believe me, I had a lot of nice pictures. But I must have erased them and I will make new until tomorrow and I hope you can wait until then. When I realised that I had lost the pictures I made my own picture. Yes, the masterpieces on your left hand side above and on the right hand side.

And on the right hand side you can see yet another masterpiece, and I think you get the picture on how it looks when we are connected to the buoy. Pretty easy. But I will look for the other pictures and I will upload them tomorrow and now you have a little something to look forward to. There are only 4 or 5 ships like this in the world so it is quite an experience you will get here on www.aladdin.st, as usually.

I really can't help about the faux pas with the picture I got from Statoil's binder about STL. But I will try to compensate with a few exciting pictures from our bridge, and I know that you will appreciate this and especially Unge Herr Sjöofficeren.
Aladdin's adventure onboard DE/T Randgrid
Bridge - Conning station

Aladdin's adventure onboard DE/T Randgrid
Bridge - DP station

Aladdin's adventure onboard DE/T Randgrid
Bridge - Radio station, office and chart table

Aladdin's adventure onboard DE/T Randgrid
Bridge - Cargo control

OK, I'm sorry to say that this is what I have time for today. And I'm even more sorry to say that I didn't had time for my Thai books today (again) I will have time for a few words about my adventure onboard M/T Vestria back in 1984 before it is time for me to f@ck off out of here to go relieve 2nd Officer on the bridge. And I will hopefully not find any cookies there today.

+++++++++++++++
Thursday 8th of September 2011 and we're back at Heidrun Oil Field moored at Heidrun DSL #2
Aladdin's adventure onboard DE/T Randgridso I didn't expect much excitements when I came on my watch quarter to midnight.

And I was for sure not expecting to find the cookie jar, especially after our talk yesterday.
- Do you hate me?

2nd Officer took the cookies when he left and I had 4 slices of SKOVMAND during my night watch. Waiting to start loading and I had expected a tedious watch, but I had several reports to do and times fly by and it was soon time to go to bed. I took a few pictures from Statoil's manual for STL mooring before I went to bed and now I can put them on my web page for you to see how the mooring operation works.
Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid
We receive the line from a working boat and we connect it to our line on deck

Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid
If they don't have a working boat we have to shoot a line with a rocket trying to catch the line from the buoy


But seriously, I think my own drawings are a wee bit better. Well, never mind, if you think you can handle Statoil's picture I will try to guide you through the process to connect to the STL buoy. We connect to the line on the STL buoy and we're moving slow towards the DSL centre. DSL stands for Direct Shuttle Loading and that means that we're getting the oil straight from the oil field and thus there is no need for any storage tankers or terminals between us and the oil. Just the oil rig pumping up the oil and delivers the oil to us through a pipe line.
Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid
We're connected our line to the line on the buoy

Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid
We drop the line back to the sea and we start heaving up the line through the bottom of the ship
We heave up the slack on the lines while we move towards the DSL centre. So we're not heaving the buoy towards us. We use our DP to get in to exact position so we can heave the STL straight up as soon as we're in position over the DSL centre.

When we're in position we heave up the mooring line, now the first line is onboard and we are heaving on the mooring line. As you understand we must use a messenger ( A small line) in the beginning, imagine how easy it is to work with the heavy duty mooring line. To connect the messengers are quite easy and we just heave up the line with our winch and we will never have to bother about the mooring line. We're scratching our behinds while the winch does the job.
Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid
Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid

When the STL buoy is in position we secure it by means of hydraulic locks and when the STL room es empty from water we lower the manifold over the STL buoy and we connect by means of hydraulic claws the keep us connected to the STL buoy during the loading.

The guy that invented this was for sure not sitting in the last row throwing erasers at the Teachers back in school. But, hmm, I still like the sand bags the best.
Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid
When we're connected we open up the valves onboard and we have the GREEN LINE and we're ready to go. If you have forgotten about the GREEN LINE just go back to the month of August and you will soon find out about the GREEN LINE.

It is about 150 to 300 meters water depth around us so it would be impossible for us to go down walk around the sea bed to have a look on how it looks. But thanks to Statoil's excellent picture in their instruction manual for Heidrun Oil field we can get a pretty good picture on how it looks.

So instead of having to worry about sharks and whatever lives down there you can just sit down relax in your favourite armchair while exploring the sea bed at Heidrun Oil Field.
Thanks' to Statoil's excellent offshore loading manual.
Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid

Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid
OK, enough of boring pictures already! OK, this is it, if you want to know more you can always
Hej på dej!
Jag har nu uppdaterat mig lite om vad som har hänt i ditt liv den senaste tiden ( är ju ute och jobbar igen, så det finns inte sådär jättemycket annat roligt att sysselsätta sig med)

Måste säga att jag är imponerad av din kroppshydda, eller rättare sagt; din minskning av kroppshydda! Du har hittat det rätta för dej, kullerbyttor och bensprattel! Om du fortsätter i den stilen så får du snart döpa om din hemsida till "sallad-in"
( Fast sidan har ju, som du själv säger, blivit lite tråkigare nu när man inte får se dej sovande på någon bardisk, iförd en konstig mössa längre)

Mindre imponerad blev jag av tårtbakningen...men jag fick mej ett mycket gott skratt iallafall!

Å ganska besviken blev jag när du mönstrar av i Brofjorden, åkrt genom Göteborg utan att ens säga hej och utan att ge en en chans att ens kunna vinka av dej på flyget

Lite kul var det oxå att se bilderna från Angkor Wat, har alltid velat åka dit, så nu blev jag lite avis på dej!

Annars hoppas jag att allt e bra å det å sånt!

Tjing/ Ingela
search the internet. And I can't but remember www.aladdin.st back in the good ol' days. It was fun from early morning to late evening. Now it is only boxing and STL pictures, enough to make anyone want to jump overboard.

And it is not like people are letting me forget. I received an e-mail a few weeks ago when I was home in Bangkok. Swedish only, but I will try to translate it for you.

HI!
Your web page and your exciting life is the only thing making me want to get out of bed in the morning.

I'm impressed by your weight loss. But your page has turned a wee bit boring without the pictures of you sleeping on a bar counter with a stupid cap on your head.


Yeah, she was feed up with boring pictures from Bangkok Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T RandgridFight Club , Chakrit Muay Thai School and stupid trees in Cambodia. Well, I guess this is how exciting a life on a diet gets. But this will hopefully soon change. If I can only skip the cake and our Cook's homemade bread.

I woke up by a phone call in the morning, 20 minutes past 9 or 10. 3 signals and I suppose that they had got the wrong number. I never reached the phone before they hang up and I was back in bed. Then I don't know if they called again, but at 12 our 2nd Officer called.
- Are you on the way?
- What time is it?
- 12
- Did you call 20 minutes before 12?
- Yes
- Did I answer?
- Ah, you want me to call until you answer
- Yes, please, is it you that have called me all morning?
- OK, go have your lunch then you can come relieve me
- I don't eat

I had a quick shower and I was on the bridge, well, about 10 minutes later. If I knew what I would discover later on in the afternoon I would have had a 45 minutes' shower and a 2 hours lunch. There were no sign off any cookies when I Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgridcame on the bridge. There was an empty plate and our 2nd Officer got started about how nice he was.
- I threw all the pastries before you came
- That's the spirit!

I made myself a pot of tea and I went to the fridge to get some milk.
- What the
I ran in to what must go down the history book as world's most pathetic try to hide a cookie jar. I saw the red cookie jar behind a boiler suit next to the fridge. He is not even trying to hide the darn cookies. He must really hate me.

And believe me, I was not looking for it. It was just impossible to miss the darn cookies. Yeah, it was almost like they jumped out and punched me on the nose. Yes, I was disappointed and I will have a serious talk with him Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgridnext time I run in to him.

Heidrun oil Field and we had a gorgeous afternoon with sunshine, we had strong winds, but it was a very nice afternoon for being Heidrun Oil Field.

I had finished my reports during the night and I spent the afternoon with the charts and time turned pretty quick.

Our Assistant Electrician was working with the new computer for the HPR that he installed in Mongstad. Well, I was relieved and I went to check out the kitchen department and our Hero Mr “I like the Pain”. I discovered smoked salmon in the mess room so I had a quick salmon sandwich before continuing to the kitchen to pester our kitchen crew.
Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid
Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid
Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid
Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid
They were busy baking bread in the kitchen and I had a few pictures of the bread before I Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgridreturned to the bridge to ask if Chief Officer Jr needed to be relieved for his dinner. He is usually never eating any Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgriddinner, but you never know so I went to the bridge to ask him if he was going to eat.

They were still working with the computer when I returned to the bridge. Our Assistant electrician was now using Chief Officer Jr as a handyman.

Our Chief Officer Jr wanted to have dinner and I relieved him and when he returned 10 minutes later I went for my dinner. Apple pie, ice cream and custard for dessert and I'm proud to say that I skipped the dessert even Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgridthough our Cook and Mess men were nagging on me like their life's depended on me eating the darn apple pie. But I said no and I left the mess room and I was back to check out printer cartridges in our store room.

Our 2nd Officer had changed one of the cartridges this morning and he asked me if we had any more in the store room.
- I could not find any
- I will take care of it! You just make sure the keep the bridge clear of any cookies.
Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid
As you understand this took place before I discovered the cookies this afternoon. And just after that he had showed me the empty plate and he had informed me that he had thrown Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgridaway the pastries.

We had plenty cartridges and I returned to my cabin for a few words on my web page. DARN! Boring just to sit in the cabin.
- Hmm, what to do?
YEAH! Let's go make some trouble with the galley crew. Great idea and I took my camera and I went down to A-deck. No one in the mess room and there was the apple pie. I can have the smallest piece ever. Just one! I took one piece in a bowl and I soaked the pie in custard and I went to get a glass of water.

When I came back I ran in to our Cook and he had discovered my camera on the table and it was impossible to stop him from taking pictures. DARN! I had expected to enjoy my custard and apple pie all by lonesome. But our Cook was all over the place taking pictures of as he called it “The smallest piece of apple pie ever”
Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid
Have some apple pie with the custard

-OK! Motherf@cker, enough already with the pictures! Don't you have something important to do?
He f@cked off out of thereand I could enjoy my apple pie. Delicious! Mm mm mm! This was good and it was nice to be alone, for 15 seconds. Then our Cook returned.
- WHAT THE F@CK IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid
This time he came in to the mess room with fresh bread, the biggest loafs I had ever seen.
- I thought we were friends. You promised to help me with my diet!

Obviously he had forgotten this promise and our bet. Yesterday I told him that he had to pay me Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid100 US $ every time I stepped inside the mess room. He promised to kick my behind every time he saw me in the mess room.
- Is this what you call kicking behind?

I finished my custard in a jiff and I Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgridescaped from the mess room before I would have made myself unlucky with the fresh bread.

I had a quick stop at the smoke room before I went to the crew's day room.

Killer was alone in the day room and he was checking out www.aladdin.st for the latest pictures.

He was scrolling up and down the page.
- Where is the next button?
He continued to scroll up and down the page
- Where is the next button?
I give up, I think I have covered every different way to get to Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgridthe next page. And don't ask me in how many languages and it is still hard to work out how to get to the next page.
- How hard can it be?

I asked him if he thought the NEXT link was at the beginning or the end of the page. He thought about it for a few seconds and then he hit the “Page down” button until he reached the end and the “NEXT” button. Well, there is no trophy and medal for figuring this out.

I returned to my web page and Thai books in my cabin. I have not opened my Thai books for 2 days so it is about time. And I will hopefully have time for a few words on my M/T Vestria adventure before it is time to go to relieve 2nd Officer on the bridge at midnight. And I'm looking forward to an interesting discussion about the cookies.

+++++++++++++++
Friday 9th of September 2011 and my night watch passed pretty quickly and I was in bed around 4 thirty in the morning. And I woke up before my wakeup call so I was in the shower when our Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid2nd officer called to wake me up 20 minutes before 12 o'clock.

I was on the bridge 10 minutes before 12 and it was a gorgeous afternoon. Sunshine and no wind, well, it turned gloomy and grey after an hour. But the gloom just lasted for 30 minutes or so and the sun came back. I spent the afternoon reading manuals and drawings of our cargo system.

At 15 thirty Captain came on the bridge and he told me that there would be a helicopter arriving at 10 thirty tomorrow morning. He showed me how to send the weather report from the BLOM. We need to send the report 1 hour before the helicopter takes off from Kristiansund. The weather was very nice, but we were rolling slightly due to some swell from the Atlantic.

So we might have to fire up our DP tomorrow morning to keep the swell coming in from forward.
- We need to have a green light for 20 minutes before sending the weather report or the helicopter won't come. There is a green icon on the BLOM screen and that means that the weather is good for helicopter. But if it turns red the helicopter won't come.
Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid
One of the criteria is the movement of the ship, if we're rolling too much the helicopter cant land on the helipad and the icon turns red. So even if we have nice weather and the swell is coming in from the side we're rolling a wee bit too much. So we need to swing the ship around the DSL ( Direct Shuttle Loading) Centre to get our bow against the swell by means of our DP. When we have the swell coming in from forward there won't be any rolling and the red icon turns green and the helicopter can arrive.

- YEAH, FINALLY! I can start making some entries in my DP log book!
We will leave with the helicopter on Wednesday and I will only get 28 days and I was told that I would get my 30 days. But I sent an e-mail to Norwegian Training Centre in Manila and I asked them if 28 days would be enough to participate in the advanced course.

I heard a rumour that it would be enough with 28 days and I will hopefully get a positive reply so I can go to Manila for some training. Almost 1 year since I took my lat course in Manila and I'm looking forward to get back.

If we need the DP they will start at 7 in the morning and that means a long night for me. I want to be on the bridge when they start the operation. And if I manage to fall asleep around 5 or 5 thirty I will never be able to get out of bed for 7 o'clock. So I'm better off staying up and I need Diet MAX, plenty Diet MAX.

I dashed down to our Cooks store room and I brought a case of Diet MAX to the bridge. And as I told Captain and Chief Officer Jr.
- I can enjoy a few Diet MAX while asking you thousands of stupid questions tomorrow.
Yes, I'm really looking forward to some early morning action tomorrow morning. And I went to bed trying to catch a few hours of sleep preparing myself for tomorrow morning. But I was so excited and it was impossible to fall asleep. DARN! What do to?

- YEAH! I WILL GO TO THE BRIDGE TO PLAY MISCHIEFS WITH CAPTAIN AND CHIEF OFFICER JR!!

+++++++++++++++
Saturday 10th of September 2011 and I spent my night watch making a drawing of our pump room and the cargo lines on deck. Always nice to do when coming on a new ship, easier to learn the system when you do it yourself instead of just study a drawing. And it would be embarrasing not to do it. When I'm a Chief Officer I always ask the 2nd Officers to do the same so they know the deck. Well, I don't ask all of the 2nd Officers. But sometimes I run in to someone interessted in learning and we remember the last one, the 2nd Officer on Ternvik.

The darn helicopter icon was green during my watch and I realised that there would not be any DP excitements during the morning so I went straight to bed after my watch.
Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid
Well, we had yet another gorgeous afternoon and the service people spent the afternoon in our STL room looking at the buoy. Captain was on the bridge and I learnt a lot about the STL system. Yeah, nice to work with people that know their stuff so I can pick up a few things.

I worked with our bridge consoles after my watch, the work is due on Monday but as it was sunshine and nice weather I did it today. On Monday it might we raining and storming so I'm better off doing it when we have nice weather.

I went to my cabin after dinner and I had a few words about my adventure onboard M/T Vestria back in 1984 before I went on B-deck for some Saturday night bingo. First prize is a camera and I had promised our Pumpman that I would give him the camera if I won. Second price was an electric tooth brush and this was the prize I was hoping for. And so did our Chief Officer Jr
Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid
The BINGO was going to take off at 8 and I went down to B-deck a few minutes before 8. There was already some people in the day room and I also discovered what must have been a cubic ton of chocolates and chips. MY DIET!
- CHIEF OFFICER JR! MAY HE BURN IN HELL!!

Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid
Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid
Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid
The last participant arrived a few minutes past 8 and our Deck Cadet could explain the rules. There would be 2 games with a 5 minutes break between the excitements. Game 1:
• One row is a chocolate prize
• 2 rows is a chocolate prize
• A full board is a MP3 player.
CHOCOLATE!!! I felt bad because of too much chocolate, and that was even before the BINGO had started. And they are going to hand out chocolate as prizes as well.
Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid
The second game had a chocolate prize as well:
• One row is a chocolate prize
• 2 rows is electric tooth brush
• A full board is a camera
I bought 4 bingo boards or whatever they call them and we started the game. And I will hopefully not win any chocolate. Actually, I told Chief Officer Jr to hit me as hard as he could on my nose if he saw me take any more chocolate. DARN! I really need to work on myself discipline.
Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid

Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid

Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid
Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid
Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid

Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid

Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid
Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid
Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid
I was very lucky at the first game, I didn't win any of the chocolate. I kept my 4 BINGO boards Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgridor whatever they call it for the second game. Our Deck Cadet told us that it was a 5 minutes break so I went to discuss a new BINGO tactic
with some of the guy that had went down to the smoke room.
Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid








We came back to the day room on B-deck ready for the second game. The second game was a wee bit different from the first game.

I had 4 BINGO board or whatever they call them. And the guys next to me helped me to keep track of the numbers. But everyone wanted to win the camera, except for me and Chief Officer Jr and no one helped me at the second game. It was no problem to keep track of the numbers. I just want to mention it so you understand the change that took place during the break.
Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid

Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid
2nd game took off and it was the same guy winning the first chocolate prize that had won the first chocolate prize at the first game. Good, I don't need to worry about winning any chocolate.

Next prize was the electric tooth brush and the competition was fierce between me and the Chief Officer Jr. But I was far off when our Assistant Electrician screamed BINGO. DARN!
Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid
Well, now it was only the camera and I was fighting for our Pump man, would be fun if I won so I could give him the camera. But none of us won, the chocolate guy won the camera as well.

The crew disappeared from the day room and I returned to my cabin. Now I have plenty work with the pictures so I can upload all of our Saturday excitements. And as I told our Deck Cadet.
- You better hope that the girls in Bergen don't discover my page so they see the picture of you playing BINGO o a Saturday night. They will never talk to you again.

+++++++++++++++
Sunday 11th of September 2011 and loading was in full swing when I relieved 2nd Officer on the bridge at midnight. We started to load 2 minutes after 6 o'clock in the evening and we were Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgridwhopping arses with a loading rate of 500m³/h. So it was back to the normal watch routines, keeping an eye on the ullages and IG pressure.

My afternoon watch was a little more exciting than the night watch. Our 2 service men for the STL buoy that arrived yesterday were going to leave with the helicopter during the afternoon and one of our 2nd Engineers were leaving as well.

The helicopter icon refused to turn red so I didn't expect any DP action. And well, anyway, my DP sodas that I brought on the bridge the other day are almost finished anyway. So never mind.
Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid
Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid
Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid
We sent a helicopter manifest and weather report to the helicopter company and the helicopter had to make 2 stops before it came to us. We saw the helicopter leaving Heidrun's helipad and she Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgridarrived to our helipad 2 or 3 minutes later at 17:05 according to the helicopter pilots clock.

The helicopter left us at 17:17 and I had got a few pictures. But I will not post the pictures until Wednesday. This is pretty much how it will look when we're leaving on Wednesday and as I'm not allowed to have any camera on the helicopter I will use today's pictures.

When the helicopter left our Captain discovered whales and I went to the bridge wing with my camera. But I didn't have any luck trying to get a picture of any whale and I gave up after a few minutes.

I went for my dinner in the mess room and I put my camera on the table in the mess room and I Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgridwent to get some food. I filled my plate and when I turned around I ran in to an onslaught of clicks from my camera.

Our Cook! He is playing with my camera again. He was all over the place taking my pictures. Luckily enough I just had a small helping on my plate, would have been embarrassing if I had loaded the plate with a cubic ton.

I was just about to finish my dinner when our 2nd Officer came down, and he was obviously coming straight from bed. DARN! I would have to keep him company and I had our galley crew's excellent blueberry rice pudding. Their rice pudding reminds me a lot of my own Swedish sticky rice with mango. Impossible to forget what a success that turned in to. Well, anyway, we talked about the good ol' days and when our 2nd Officer was finished I expected us to leave the mess room.

Obviously there is no bottom in the 2nd Officer and he got going with rice pudding and apple pie.
- What the
So I had to take a piece of apple pie in a bowl of custard just to keep him company. Yes, POLITE is my middle name and this is how I'm brought up, being Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgridpolite. And then I had to have a second bowl of custard with apple pie just to show our galley crew how much I appreciated their food. So everybody is happy at the end of the day, except me.

Our 2nd officer was finally finished with his dinner and we could leave the mess room.

But I needed to have a “chat” with the galley crew so I stayed behind when the 2nd Officer left the mess room.
- MOTHERF@CKERS!

I started to scold the guys, yesterday they had put raisins in the cake, excellent! I don't eat raisins so I didn't have any cake yesterday. I asked them to put raisins in pretty much everything they were making in the kitchen.
- Was this too much to ask for? LOOK! Today I ate too much dessert and I hold you responsible!
This would never have happened if they had bothered to put raisins in the food. I could not believe my eyes. Our Cook was giving me the ZIP IT routine. MY VERY OWN ZIP IT ROUTINE!
- ZIP IT PORKY!
- What the

I left the mess room and I went to check out if there was any action on the bridge. Our Chief Officer Jr and Electrician had a chat about the good ol' times and as we were going home in 3 days. Well, just a little more than 2 days and the spirit was high.
Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid
Sunday and I don't do any Thai readings during the weekend so I could have a power nap. I was very sleepy after all the darn dessert and I felt asleep as soon as I hit the bed and I woke up 2 hours later. I had some time to write down the latest drivel on my web page before it was time to go relieve 2nd Officer on the bridge for a new exciting night watch on the bridge.

+++++++++++++++
Monday 12th of September 2011 and my night watch passed pretty quick. I had slept a wee bit too long last night so I wasn't tired when Chief Officer Jr came to relieve me at 4 and it was almost 5 Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrido'clock when I left the bridge. Back in bed and I didn't felt asleep until it was almost 8 o'clock. So I was tired when 2nd Officer called me 20 minutes before 12 for my afternoon watch.

I discovered a gorgeous day when I came on the bridge 10 minutes before 12. The sea was like an windmill pond and the sun was shining.

But we were rolling slightly due to the swell, long swell so the swell was not apparent. But we were rolling and the helicopter icon was red all day long. Well, it continues like this we might have to fire up the DP on Wednesday when the helicopter comes to pick us up.
But by then it will most likely be too late to make any entries in my DP log book.
Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid

My afternoon watch passed pretty quickly while I enjoyed tea and Diet MAX in the sunshine. I went on deck to Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgridcheck out some stuff and I had to be back on the bridge to relieve Chief Officer Jr at 17 thirty. They are having a safety meeting and I will take the watch on the bridge.

It was almost 7 when they finished their meeting and I returned to my cabin. I asked our 2nd Officer if he could wake me up at 9.

I was a wee bit tired due to lack of sleep. But I didn't want to sleep too much because then it will be impossible to fall asleep tomorrow and we have to start all over again. I tried to sleep but it was impossible so I got out of bed at 8 thirty. There is always a few word to write on my web page.

And as tomorrow is my last full day onboard I have some laundry to do so I'm prepared to leave on Wednesday afternoon. And I will hopefully be able to finish the page about my adventure onboard M/T Vestria tonight and I will just have to get some stuff I forgotten back home and this page is completed.

I skipped my Thai studies, soon time to go home so I can as well pack my books and thus saving some time tomorrow night when I will finish my packing. And I will pretty much be ready to leave on Wednesday afternoon when the chopper is coming.

+++++++++++++++
Tuesday 13th of September 2011 and my night watch was pretty slow, I will go home in a short while and I find it pretty hard to muster any interest in the manuals. So I spent most of the time watching the IG pressure and ullages.

I left the, darn it was almost 5 o'clock again. I must stop socialising with Chief Officer Jr in the morning. I was dead tired due to lack of sleep. But as soon as I got in to bed I was wide awake again and I didn't felt asleep until 7 thirty something.
Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid
I put on the lettle first thing coming on my afternoon watch 5 minutes before 12. It was cloudy but Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgridsunny and the wind had picked up during the morning. The sun disappeared after a few hours and a beautiful midday turned in to a gloomy and grey afternoon.

I don't know why, but it is the same on all the ships I have been working on. Who the f@ck put back an empty milk carton in the fridge? Well, not empty, but with just a Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgridfew drops left. It is like people are thinking “Am I lucky or what? There are a few drops left and I don't have to arrange for a new carton. I just put back the carton because it is NOT empty”

I had to call the kitchen and I asked one of our Mess men to bring a carton of milk to the bridge.
- Can you please bring a case of Diet MAX as well?
- No problem!
- That's the spirit we're looking for!
Even though I enjoyed a Diet MAX my watch was very slow. Yes, it is the same every time it is time to sign off, time is very slow.

I will soon be back at Bangkok Fight Club and at Chakria Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T RandgridMuay Thais School. I got an e-mail from the American girl and she is all blue and black from the sparring. She showed up at her job with a black eye and they didn't believe her when she said that she was training Thai boxing.

They thought it was her boyfriend that had beaten her up. Well, I don't know, maybe this is the normal practice in Thailand.

Finally, my watch came to an end. But it was almost 5 o'clock before I left. I spent half of an hour talking with Chief Officer Jr and then he went for dinner while I covered for him on the bridge.



Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid

Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid
I was in the mess room just before 5 for my dinner. I had one helping and I was about to leave when 2nd officer arrived. So I had to have on courtesy helping to keep him company.

we had a good time and it didn't take long before “Killer” satt down at the table next to us. He started to play with the AB's walkie talkie and I asked if he knew how to handle the radio.
- You know, it looks very easy on the TV, but it is not all that easy!
- OH YES! I have worked with this equipment before!
- Where the have you been working using STATE-OF-THE-ART equipment?
Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid
Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid
Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid
We finished our dinner and I moved over to the smoke room to see if there was something happening in there. Our Pump man and Bosun were having a smoke when I came in to the smoke room. And they Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgridasked what time the helicopter arrived tomorrow.

Well, the helicopter usually arrives quarter past 3 and I hope to be the duck out of here 10 minutes later.

When they left for work I told them that i would see them on the helipad tomorrow afternoon.
- I will ki....... you, our Pump man said.
- WHAT!!??
- I will ki....... you
- You will kiss or kick me? I hope it is not the kiss!
- I WILL KISS YOU!
- Can I choose between the kiss and the kick? I think I prefer the kick.

Pump man and Bosun returned to deck and I went to my cabin trying to catch some sleep. But it was Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgridimpossible to fall asleep. I tried to sleep for 20 minutes and then I moved from my bed to my computer for a few words on my web page.

I packed my bags and I managed to kill Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid3 minutes doing that, but I still had several hours before it was time to go on my watch at midnight. We need to check the weight of my luggage for the helicopter manifest that we send to the helicopter before arrival. Luggage and how many passengers.

Luckily enough I had not removed my luggage tags from the flight 395 from Kristiansund to Randgrid when I joined the ship. 3 pieces of luggage, 1 bag 8 kg and the other bag 14 kg (My camera and snus) and my lap top 11 kg. Should be the same going back, of course, I have used some tooth paste and vitamin tablets during my 4 weeks onboard. And I have about the same amount of snus as when I joined the ship thanks' to my shopping spree in Mongstad. Well, I'm ready to leave.

+++++++++++++++
Wednesday 14th of September 2011 and we're going to leave in the afternoon. And as I'm not allowed to have any camera onboard I can as well prepare my departure pictures. Yes, we remember last Sunday afternoon helicopter adventure extravaganza. It will look pretty much the same tomorrow so I will throw in these pictures here and then I don't have to think about this anymore.
Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid
The helicopter arrives, and it will most likely be as gloomy and grey when we're leaving

Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid
The helicopter arrives, and it will most likely be as gloomy and grey when we're leaving

Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid
Approaching the helipad and our Helicopter Landing Officer and the crew are stand by.
We are standing under the helipad waiting for the on signers so we can take their survival suits before boarding the helicopter

Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid
Approaching the helipad and our Helicopter Landing Officer and the crew are stand by.
We are standing under the helipad waiting for the on signers so we can take their survival suits before boarding the helicopter

Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid

Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid
Helicopter safe on the helipad and the crew secure the helicopter

Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid
Off signers climbing up to the helipad and the helicopter.
Here we have to imagine Aladdin coming first up on the helipad taking the best seat in the helicopter

Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid
Crew are unloading and loading the helicopter while we board the helicopter

One more helicopter picture and I will throw up. Well, anyway, there will not be any more helicopter pictures, this is it and this is how it will look when we're leaving tomorrow afternoon. Now I have finished my departure pictures and this is ready when I'm back home and I don't need to waste any valuable FUNKY TOWN time with these pictures. I can go straight to Bangkok fight Club when I'm back home from Robinson with milk and egg for my omelette. I might call SCAN DELI for some salmon, but we have to see about this.

Next upload will be when I'm back home, so until then, over and out from Heidrun Oil field.
Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid
I was dressed for signing off and my luggage was stand-by in my cabin when I came on my afternoon watch. I relieved 2nd Officer and he was busy filling ballast water. The Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgriddarn helicopter icon was read and they had fired up the DP. Yes, time to go home and the helicopter icon is red. Yeah, the only thing we need now is a cancelled helicopter flight so we will have to stay onboard. Or the helicopter will be late and we will have to stay a night at a hotel in Kristiansund. Nothing I'm Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgridlooking forward to.

We went to watch a helicopter safety video in the day room on B-deck at 1 o'clock and this took us about 15 minutes.

A requirement before any helicopter flight and all the off signers had to watch the video. And we are for sure hoping that the helicopter can make it.

As soon as the icon turns red it stay red for Aladdin's adventure at Heidrun Oil Field with DE/T Randgrid20 minutes so every time the ship rolls over the icon turns red. But we got information from the helicopter base that they would send the helicopter at 14:30 and it would arrive onboard about 1 hour later.

I went on deck just before 3 thirty in the afternoon and it was windy on deck and it was pretty cold. I was only wearing shorts and t-shirt and I spent most of the time in the fire fighting store under the helipad. And when we finally could hear the helicopter arriving at 15:45 I was jumping up and down in joy.
FINALLY TIME TO GO HOME!!

The on signers luggage was brought down on tank deck and they load our luggage on the helicopter and we donned the survival suits and we took our seats in
Here we go again
So we have reached the end of my web page? Not yet! But we have reached the tricky part.

Here we have an example of what we call a “TEXT LINK” in HTML coding, a word that you double click to get to another page. That's why they call it a link. Different colour, standard colour for a link is blue underlined text, and an already visited link turns from blue to purple.

Those colours can of course be changed by the person writing the code.

So on your left hand side you have different underlined words in blue (Purple if the link has been clicked already)

So go ahead, check it out! How hard can it be? So hopefully no more:
- Aladdin, I can't see my pictures!
- Aladdin, my wife can't see my pictures!
- Aladdin, my children can't see my pictures!
the helicopter. The helicopter took off, 10 meters and he descended again.
- Is it the extra can of Diet MAX I put in my bag? Are we going to crash?

Well, no problem with my can of Diet MAX, the helicopter finally lifted and we took of towards the helicopter base in Kristiansund. Yes, I'm off to my holiday and all about my adventure in FUNKY TOWN is just ONE click away!


       
                  

OK, it has come to my knowledge that we have senior citizens visiting my web page. How hard can it be? So it's not very easy for them to see the blue coloured links to the next page. So
Jiffy (also jiff)

noun [in SING.] informal a moment: we'll be back in a jiffy.

ORIGIN late 18th cent.: of unknown origin.

So as you understand, in a jiff pretty much depends on your internet.
I put a “Next” button here and I hope that there isn't any problem to understand how to use that one.
So just CLICK the “Next” button on your left hand side and you will be on the next page in a jiff!

Marunong ka mag-tagalog? Walang problema! Magpunta sa kabilang pahina pindutin ang “NEXT” button sa itaas

Faites vous parlez le français? Pas de problème! Pour arriver à la page suivante faites s'il vous plaît un déclic le bouton “Next” ci-dessus!

Haga usted dice el español? No hay problema! Ver la siguiente página sólo hacer clic el botón “Next” encima!

Farla parla l'italiano? Non problemi! Per vedere la prossima pagina lo scatto per favore giusto Il bottone “Next” sopra

Sprechen sie Deutsch! Kein problem! Wenn Sie die folgende Seite sehen wollen gerade klicken der Knopf “Next” oben!

คุณพูดภาษาไทยได้ไหม ไม่มีปัญหา ถ้าคุณต้องการไปหน้าถัดไป ให้กดปุ่ม “Next” ข้างบนนี้

Вы говорите по-русски? NJET PROBLEMA! Просто нажмите синюю кнопку "Next" с левой стороны и Вы моментально переместитесь на следующую страницу!

E ni Svenskar och inte förstår Engelska så ska ni skämmas. J och Björn, med det menar jag inte att alla mina stavfel ska ältas varje gång vi träffas.

Flag of Skåne / Skånska flaggan Well, the flag of Skåne, just a BONUS flag.




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